Parents

[DanielleBlock]

Hi my parents are not happy about me getting married because im not finished with college.. how can i make them see that its not going to be any different if i get married because we already live together.. what should i tell them?

[CindySue]

Ok.......IMO.....if you are already living together I wouldnt think it would be such a big deal about getting married. Brian and I live together and people have wondered why we are waiting till May to get married.
Do your parents have any problems with your FH? If they did, that would explain things a little.
Im sorry I cant really give you much help except that I suggest you should sit down with your parents and find out exactly why they dont want you getting married. It sounds like it might be a little more than just because your still in college.
Good Luck!

[andysgirl07]

I agree with Cindy, if you're already living together I don't see why they would be upset about you getting married. Are you getting any financial aid or anything like that for school that might be affected if you got married? If so, they could just be worried about ya'll's financial state.

[Jenn060306]

How much longer do you have until you finish college? When are you getting married?

I am still in College as well. But i am done this April and will be getting married in June. My parents stated they did not want me to live with my FH until i was done college (even though we were going to the same school). But 2 years ago they finally decided that they would be ok with us living together. They were concerned that i wouldn't be able to get as much accomplished. That i would be distracted by him being there.
With us deciding to get married they stated that they wouldn't help pay for my schooling if i was going to get married before i finished.
You should sit down and talk with them. Find out why they are so against you getting married. You're right, it doesen't make sence to not marry when you are already living together. Tell them why you feel getting married before you are done school is good. There are probaly reasons they have never thought of.
Here in the eyes of the law you are in a common law marriage after 3 months.

Good Luck!

[usahgrad]

I think I can see where your parents are coming from. One of my sorority sisters took a semester off to "plan her wedding" and then never went back. Just make sure that they know that your education is really important to you and that you're not going to forsake it for wedding plans. Good luck!

[rainbowtreat]

Jenn060306

Here in the eyes of the law you are in a common law marriage after 3 months.


WOW that is short. Not sure if it is still in effect but her eit used to be 6 years for commonlaw.

[usahgrad]

WOW! That is SHORT! I'd be Jason's common-law wife almost three times over if that's the time that was the law here.

[Jenn060306]

Jenn060306

Here in the eyes of the law you are in a common law marriage after 3 months.


WOW that is short. Not sure if it is still in effect but her eit used to be 6 years for commonlaw.



In Ontario it's that way apperently. I'm not sure about everywhere eles. Mark and i have been living together for 2 years now.

[WebLady]

I heard it was 7 sears but I am pretty sure that most states had done away with the whole common law thing now. But I could be wrong ... I know they don't have it here in Georgia anymore.

I found this interesting article about the subject -- http://www.unmarried.org/common-law-marriage.html

Best wishes,

~ WebLady :)

[andysgirl07]

I know this thread was only started two days ago, but has anything happened? Did you get it worked out, Danielle?

[WebLady]

Personally, I think that sometimes parents need to 'butt out' and let their kids live their lives and in some cases (not that this is one of those) make their own mistakes. But I know it is hard for them when they think they are right and I know they want the best for their kids.

I had some similar issues with my Mom a while back and I finally told her this ... Mom, I love you but I am grown now. You have to realize that I may not always do what you think I should do and that you may not always agree with the choices I make and/or how I live my life. But you have to let me live it and if I am to make mistakes then I have to make them and learn from them ... it is MY life and if you want to continue to be a part of it you will have to keep your opinions to yourself if you cannot be positive and supportive of me.

Well, I hope it works out for you.

Best wishes,

~ WebLady :)

[wolf4091]

what do you tell them? absolutely nothing. you are a consenting adult who is going to college which takes alot of drive and discipline in itself. i think you are quite capable of getting married if you wish to. you already live together and they liked the person before right? so now you are making it official. they should be thrilled that you obviously have enough values probably which they themselves instilled in you. do your thing and be happy!!!