My brother joined the army ...

[WebLady]

He told the family the other day and I talked to him about it today. I have mixed feelings about it.

On one hand I think it may be good for him; I am sure it will make a better person out of him and it will give him a career and such. But then I worry that he has done this for the wrong reasons and hasn't fully thought it out; and then of course I would worry if he got deployed (he joined the infantry) for combat.

But then the rational side of me knows I have to support him and that there are tons of people in the military. Anyone care to share stories and tell me I shouldn't worry?

eta - FYI; he is 21, the youngest of my two brothers and the "baby" in the family.

[miranda]

I had a friend join the Marines a little over a year ago. Like you, I had very mixed feelings about it. I still do. But I do have to admit, he has matured a LOT since he joined. He used to be very juvenile and irresponsible. Now he's as reliable and mature as anybody else. It really did do him a lot of good. He's getting deployed to Iraq next month. We'll see how that treats him....

[Dani]

Oh my heart is out to you. It is a scary thing. You are right to have mixed emotions. I know what you are going through. Is he planning on making it a life long career or just a few years?

[bichonlvr]

One of my very good friends husband is in the military...he loves it it! My sister's BF is in the AF! He has learned SOOOO much!

It makes boys men! It teaches people SOOO much!!!!

You should be PROUD of him for making this decision, I am sure it was not easy for him!!!!

What an amazing experience!!!!!

[WebLady]

Is he planning on making it a life long career or just a few years?He talks about making a career out of it, I guess we will see.

[Doglover]

I think itd definitly make a better person out of him. That is exactly what my brother needs...but he has been in trouble before so they won't take him.

[WendyNC]

My friend's brother was a few credits short of graduating from Carolina when he joined the Marines. He had never indicated any interest in that, his original career plans were to join the ministry. My friend's dad was not pleased that his son did not finish college. It was the most random thing. He went to language school and worked in translation, but of course EVERYONE had to do a few months in Iraq. He got out about a year ago after I think 8 years in the service, went back to college and finished his degree. He is still kind of floating around like he was before, but that is just how he is.

[TangoWedding]

My brother was a troubled kid. After our mother died (many years ago, when I was 7 and he was 18), he got into a lot of legal trouble....went to jail for theft, etc.

He ended up going into the army a couple of years later and came out a changed man. He now has a job paying $100k/year and is the most responsible person you'll ever meet.

He said it was the worst 5 years of his life....but it sure did him good.

I'd personally hate the idea if anyone I knew wanted to join and I'd throw a fit...but if it's what he wants, then he should do it. Sounds like it'll be good for him in the end. :grinhappy:

[shawnsgirl]

I'm not sure if this is the same brother or not that has a lot of problems but perhaps this is the best route for him..

My older cousin was kicked out of high school, ended up getting a GED, then enlisted a few years later in the Marine corps. He had nothing going for him, was having a ton of issues, and was just going down the wrong path. We supported him 100% with enlisting in the Marines. While he was in their he had structure, discipline, and had no choice to stay on the right path! It was the best thing he ever did with his life.

After he got out though after his 4 years he couldn't get the job that he wanted. Struggled with a lot and feel of the beaten path again. However, after about two years of a lot bad things, one of his former corporals got him a job in South Carolina as a paid firefighter and now he's back on the right path and from what we all hear is doing exeptionally well.

In my opinion, I think the military is a great option for those needing that type of structure when there is no place else to go. However, once my cousin was out and discouraged he went back to his old ways. Eventually though his 4 years did get him back to where he needed to be.

I think the military for my cousin did him well. If it wasn't for it, he would be doing nothing and probably would be in jail by now. I think you will find that your brother is doing an amazing thing!!

I'm sure you already planned on doing this but while he is in boot camp write him tons of letters telling him how proud you are of him and keep encouraging him. Hopefully with that he will feel better about what he will be doing and will want to make his family proud and will be encouraged!

I hope this helps!

[NicksBride]

oh boy, well I think that going into the military is the most noble and proud thing he can do for his country and they most certaintly make a man out of him. This is something that will be a career and something that he will not regret. DH was a "Trouble" child when he was younger, joined the army when he was 17, he is now 26 and still in the military and always says that he is a better man because of it. They teach you so much and give you such a sense of pride. Thank your brother for me for joining the army and for helping our country.
It is not easy, and I can understand your heartache and he will be in my thoughts to be safe!

[WebLady]

Thanks everyone :grinhappy:

[KMS]

I think that it all depends on what he makes out of the experience. If he is talking about making a career out of it then he seems like he is in it for the right reasons. I have several friends who are in the military. Some just love it and some have grown to despise it. I had very mixed feelings when they enlisted...and I still do. I do know that some of the recruiters are making empty promises because they need men so badly right now so make sure that he knows that this isn't going to magically change his life.

[WebLady]

I do know that some of the recruiters are making empty promises because they need men so badly right now
Yeah I have heard things like that and I worry if he got talked into the infantry because of the extra monetary benefits.

... so make sure that he knows that this isn't going to magically change his life.I did talk to him about it being a huge commitment and that once you're in that you can't just quit. LOL he will have to get up early and keep his room clean, which a big change from what he does now ;)

I don't know, he says he has put alot of thought into it and I can't sit here worried about all the "what if" things. So I am just gonna try to be positive, hope for the best and support him through this.

[Jacklynn]

my father was in the army... and served in the Gulf War. Before he was in the military he was into drugs and lots of drinking and such. It really made him mature... even though he already had two children (I was 3 at the time... my sister was 6 weeks old when he went to war) he still had a lot of growing up to do... and it did it for him.

So I have a positive outlook on it

[KMS]

I don't know, he says he has put alot of thought into it and I can't sit here worried about all the "what if" things. So I am just gonna try to be positive, hope for the best and support him through this.

That's the absolute best thing that you can do!

[Caleb's Bride]

I don't really have anything to add that the other ladies here haven't already said.

But I will say that I respect your brother for serving his country. He will make his sacrifices while doing his duty, but be proud in knowing that he's doing something that alot of people wouldn't have the courage to do. And that takes a big person, in my opinion.

He will be in my thoughts and I'm sure he'll be just fine. :)

[WebLady]

Thought I would update everyone on the situation (if anyone cares ;)) ... my brother ended up going into the Army National Guard. He got sworn in the other day, so there is no turning back now.

They are helping him get his GED and he will be leaving for school in a couple of weeks. Then he will head out for basic training in early November. So he will probably miss Thanksgiving, but they tell him he will be able to come home for Christmas.

There is a Nopi car show is in town at the Atlanta Motor Speedway down by our house; they have a recruiting booth there and he is working the booth this weekend.

All in all I think this whole thing will be good for him. He is already talking more like an "adult" Today, he gave me a bracelet that reads "Honoring An American Hero Serving In The Army National Guard"

[ikkin510]

I'm glad to hear that things seem to be working out for your brother. And that he will be home for Christmas.

[SerendipityCrafts]

I know it's scary for you and your family (I would feel the same way) but it does sound like he's making a really positive move for himself.

[bichonlvr]

Sounds like things worked out to be very positive! You should be proud of him :)

[rainbowtreat]

I have no stories to share to help you but I did want to say that is sounds like you and him are doing the best youcan. It soudns liek this is what he realyw ants to do and if soyou are doing the right thing by standing by him. He will be in my prayers for you.

[thefuturemrsrogers]

I have a few girlfriends with FHs/DHs in the military. It's a mixed bag for me -- my father served in the 70s, and my grandfather was in Korea. It's a very noble thing to do, to volunteer to defend the county.

On the flip, my step-father is in the reserves (24 years worth), and while it's always given him some income, he and our family live in constant fear that his unit will be called up. My FH's god-father just went for his fourth tour in Iraq (and also served in Bosnia and in the gulf war), and we wait on pins and needles to see if he'll come home.

I guess I have no problem with the military, and the men it makes out of boys -- I think my fundamental problem is (any) war itself. I wish your brother all the luck, and peace for your family, dear.

[septemberbride06]

Brandi, My little brother (19) just joined the Marines and he graduates Nov. 7, 2007...this has been a dream of his for as long as I can remember, but we all still worry about him everyday...it's not easy when a family member volunteers to be in combat.
All you can do is support their decision, and give support when needed. The marines have a 12 week boot camp (longet than any other military branch) they go through the hardest, most trying tests, and the first few weeks there is NO comtact from family...that was the hardest part!!
he writes when he gets time (which isn't often..they give him an hour a night to write, shower, bunk up, etc.)
anyway, if you ever need anything just let me know :hi:

[WebLady]

Thanks for all the support everyone :)