Rehearsal Dinner

[Elly_N_Joe]

My mom and I just set out rehearsal dinner location last night. It's at the Village Squire which I am totally excited about!

However... we have decided that we are going to purchase a few bottles of wine to be served with dinner... and that all other alcohol must be purchased by the attendees. I am sending out invites (well not really) because we have to give them a final count no later then 1 week before the rehearsal dinner. How should I put this on the invite? and should I?

Also I posted a blog on my myspace saying I was excited that we booked the Rehearsal Dinner... and Joe's sister posted a response saying to let her know when it is and what time so that she could be sure to be ontime. The thing is we weren't inviting her and her husband. However, we were inviting her daughter (which is our flower girl) and were expecting that she would come with her grandmother since they all live in the same house.... Should I suck it up and just add them to the list? Or how would I tell them otherwise?

:worm:

[allysa04]

I think that probably because its their daughter that is the fg they are thinking they are invited...if the only reason you arent inviting them is because they don't live with the daughter then I can't see why you wouldn't want them there. However if there is some underlying reason why you don't want them there, then I would kindly state that you don't have the budget for them to be there, and you honestly thought that just the grandmother would be bringing her since shes the one that she lives with....

[Elly_N_Joe]

I think that probably because its their daughter that is the fg they are thinking they are invited...if the only reason you arent inviting them is because they don't live with the daughter then I can't see why you wouldn't want them there. However if there is some underlying reason why you don't want them there, then I would kindly state that you don't have the budget for them to be there, and you honestly thought that just the grandmother would be bringing her since shes the one that she lives with....

Sorry, I might have mis worded my sentence... They ALL live in the same house, grandma, baby, daughter & hubsand... we didn't invite them cuz we were trying to keep the cost down... As of right now without them we have 22 people.

[allysa04]

That makes it hard!!! So why don't you just invite the parents and the daughter, and not the grandparent(s)..that way you only have one extra instead of 2 extra???

[WebLady]

Typically the rehearsal dinner is for the wedding party, the people with a job at the wedding. If the FG's parents (and other household members) are not IN the wedding they don't have to be invited. But if you want the FG there, I would suggest inviting her mother at least; just tell her you are sorry but that you only have room on your guest list for the two of them.

As for the wine/cash bar thing; I don't think you really have to mention that in the invites, just spread it around to the appropriate people via word of mouth.

[Elly_N_Joe]

Don't you ever wish you could just start over! lol

Ok, FMIL, FG & FG's parents all live in the same house. Orginally we were going to invite FMIL & FG, but not the FG's parents. Since they all llive in the same house, we figured the FMIL & FG would come together.

:bbeek:

[WebLady]

So tell them your guest list won't afford the extra people and that you assumed the the FG would come with FMIL since she had to be there already. Or just say that there are no kids going to be at the RD; the FG doesn't really have to be there since she is just a kid anyway IMO

Probably shouldn't post things like that on MySpace and such if you know ppl you may not want to see it will ;)

[bichonlvr]

I agree with Weblady...you posted it for the world to see... AND does the FG really need to be there???

Also, think about when you have kids...and your son/daughter is a FG/RB and you are not invited to the RD, would you be upset??

I thought immediate family is also invited to the RD...it is the groom's sister right???

What a pain huh!?!?!?!

[WebLady]

Here, I found this that might help ...

"Traditionally, the rehearsal dinner is hosted (and paid for) by the groom's parents. The bride, groom and both sets of parents and grandparents attend, as do any siblings and their partners or spouses. The officiant and his or her spouse are invited, as are the wedding party members (the flower girl gets invited with her parents). The bottom line: Anyone who needs to be at the rehearsal should also be invited to the dinner that follows (people who'll be doing readings, etc.).

Beyond that, the guest list for the rehearsal dinner is up to the host and hostess. If you invited members of the wedding party to your wedding with a date, invite them to the rehearsal dinner as well. Some people choose to invite very close relatives and anyone who's come in from out of town to the rehearsal dinner, but this isn't mandatory."

[Doglover]

i think the parents of the flower girl should come.

[EarlyBird]

Looking from a sister point of view- and remember i dont know how close they are or how close u are w/ her but imo- as his sister i would assume i was invited too- its her brother and to think his friends and your friends will be there but his silbling wont- i would be a little put off- also I agree with someone before that i thought immediate fam was always invited. but....... its usually FH family that throws this shindig so thats a wrench in the whole thing and whoever pays has the last say- just like the wedding

tough call