Address Question

[lize566]

lol I'm afraid this will be the first of many questions about how to properly address my invites b/c I am having trouble finding a site that answers these question specifically. If anybody has a fairly comprehensive site I would love to look at it!

My question is how do you address an invitation using a single envelope to a married couple with two young children but the wife kept her last name. The only thing I saw that might be correct uses Mr. John Doe and Ms. Jane Smith. Is it correct to use Ms. even though she is a Mrs? My other question involves how to address someone in the army with a title, like Captain (I don't know for sure what the title is) but you would just do that like you would a dr. right? ie. Doctor and Mrs. John Doe.

I already have another question but since I can still edit this post I will add it! One family I am inviting has a son in the navy, and he probably won't come but I want him on an invitation. I know etiquette states that he should have his own invite, but I don't really want to spend the money plus we don't know where he will be stationed by then. Do you guys think it is okay to just include him on his parents?

Thanks ladies!

[WebLady]

The way I understand it, Ms is sort of generic if you don't know if the lady is married or not; or a divorced or widowed woman. So I would use Mrs if she is married; "Mr John Doe and Mrs Jane Smith" (if the children are invited, there names would go in the inner envelope) is the way I would go there.

If you don't for sure know the rank or title of the person I would just use the regular Mr or Ms. But otherwise yes, it would be Rev. and Mrs Smith, Dr. and Mrs Doe, Lt. and Mrs Jones, etc...

ETA - Actually, it is more proper to spell out special ranks and titles such as Doctor or Lieutenant. And if inviting children over 18 that still live at home you should sent them their own separate invite.

[Panthers Bride]

For the family where the wife kept her maiden name, I would use the Ms. (that's what I'd prefer, and fairly common). If I were to keep my maiden name, I would HATE for someone to address me as Mrs. Amy Mogler, that just raises my "ick hackles." You can see if in her professional circle she is known as Mrs. Jane Doe, or Ms. As for the children, just put their titles and names underneath their parents. This is what we're doing, and we're doing the seal-n-sends.

As for the guy in the Navy, I agree with Brandi. He should get his own invite -- and if you don't know where he's stationed, just send it to his parents.