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View Full Version : Need to Vent about money and BMs!


craigsbride0630
05-18-2007, 04:44 PM
I'm really happy with two of my BMs who have taken on so much responsibility and I have had no problem but some of the others are a PITA. One of my cousins who's a BM paid for my dress when I was in her wedding so I paid for hers... no biggie. Then she calls me and tells me that her alterations are gonna cost about $150 (she's a big girl and needs a lot done to it). I told her I really could not afford it because this wedding is costing sooooo much and it was a really intense conversation. She said she could have paid it but a torando ripped through her back yard, her son needs braces, and she had two crowns done. Ok so we settled on me paying half and she would pay me back when she got her next paycheck. Well the week I'm suppose to receive it I don't so I text her "Have you sent the check?" and she got pretty mad at me for not asking her how she was doing and stuff. I can see how I could have seemed calase but in the end she said she sent it. Then later that day she texts me and says that her husband forgot and was sending it now. Ok whatever, I'm still waiting to receive it... ugh.

My MOH told me she could pay for her BM dress and then the morning when we were suppose to get it she says she can't pay until like 6 weeks before the wedding. So i kind of get forced into paying for her dress cuz i had to order it that day. She still hasn't mentioned it or payed me back. Whatever.

Last, my other cousin is in the wedding and told me she would make payments to me on the dress. That has not happened and when i mentioned it to her she says she is going to start at the end of May. So I have to confront her about that soon. Blah!

I know you're all probably thinking that I should've asked if they had the money to be a BM but i did! They said they did and the dress is only $150! I'm so sick of this! If i had to do it again i'd only have like 2 or 3 BMs not 7!

allysa04
05-18-2007, 05:34 PM
Im so so sorry! I feel for ya! Seems like when you ask them to be a BM they should think it through, the money, the time, etc, before accepting, you shouldn't even have to ask.."Hey..will you be my BM, and can you afford it??"....that sucks :(

I hope it all works out for the better in the end..GOOD LUCK!

pinkcherry83
05-18-2007, 06:34 PM
I think you should pull a guilt trip on them. They're walking all over you and you shouldn't let them - they should be HONORED that you even asked them to be in it. I say if they can't get it straight then tell them they are out of the wedding.

craigsbride0630
05-18-2007, 08:00 PM
Well that's basically what I've been doing. But when I asked my cousin if she had sent the check she got angry at me. Plus my wedding is only 6 weeks away otherwise I would have told them to leave. I'm so sick of people walking all over me and am now really firm when it comes to money and this wedding. I just think that some people are cheap and others have legit reasons to hold back on money. It still really sucks though... :irked:

mlm063007
05-19-2007, 11:05 AM
When we ordered my BM dresses I paid half down just to make sure that they were all ordered at the same time. I am having 7 BM's. I have had 4 pay me the total of the dress and I just put the other 1/2 down. The other 3 still owe me the 1/2 and and 2 of those 3 still owe the 1/2 to the bridal shop.

ANYWAY, there is only 1 that I am worried about paying for the rest of her dress. So I am going to keep it and if she isnt able to pay for it by the 1st of June I am just going to ask someone else.

I know that it isnt the exact same situation, but maybe you could find some other way. Are you giving them any gifts for being in the wedding? If so, wait until they pay you, if they dont their dress is their gift (along w/ b-day/christmas gift if need be). I am sure that you can find some way to work it out. I am sure things will work out, money just might be a little tight right now.

neebelung
05-19-2007, 11:16 AM
So sorry you're going through this .....








(and really thankful I've decided against having any attendants!!)