Unsure how to handle this one.

[Jenn060306]

Ok, so last night i happened to be staying at my parents for the night since Mark wasn't going to be home that night. My mom had a bunch of her friends over for dinner. And she drank a bit too much. I was really scared and worried about her. She was sitting on the arm of a chair here in the office and she fell into the chair and couldn't get out on her own. She kept telling me how much she loves me, and asked a couple times if i was sure i wanted to get married.
After all her friends left she had me sit with her at the dinning room table and talked to me more about being sure i wanted to get married. Telling me how much she likes Mark, but needing to be sure this is what i want. She also told me that i didn't have to be worried about Uncle Bob getting drunk at the wedding it was her i have to worry about. Which really worries me. I don't know what i will do if she drinks too much. It's really out of character for her. She told me that the reason she had drank that much was because she was celebrating good medical news. Which i understand. What happend was really scarey.
But i really don't know what to say to her now. What to do. I am worried about her drinking to much at the wedding cause i was kinda embarrised last night.

[Tiggerprincess]

Well Hunny..Just tell your mom how feel about her drinking......She should understand........Explain that it was a little embarrassing......You wish her not to drink at your wedding......She's your mom and would love nothing more than you to be happy.....Just gently explain how you feel towards the incident.......
D.D.

[LaceyinPgh]

Well, I would wait until she sobers up and gets over the hang over. Then just talk to her. Explain how embarassed and disgusted you were by what she said and how she acted. Be honest but not hurtful. Explain to her that she did emotionally hurt you a great deal. It sounds like your mother loves you very much. She doesn't want to ruin your day. Just tell her if she can't control herself then you would prefer that she didn't drink at all. If she isn't sure that she can manage that, maybe she should skip the reception. That tough love approach shoud snap her around.

[usahgrad]

I'm with Lacey, talk to her after she's sobered up and tell her how much she hurt your feelings. Also, if you're not sure that she can control herself, if you have a bartender, set a drink limit for everyone. That way no one ends up drinking too much.

This is one of the reasons I'm not having alcohol at my wedding at all. Good luck Jenn!

[Jenn060306]

Thanks. I think everything will be ok. I can't bring myself to say anything right now. She's asked a couple times now if i'm ok or if im mad at her. But i really can't say yes. I would rather not start somthing now.
I'm not sure she even realizes what she said. This is really out of character of her. I don't think it will be an issue again, but i think i might talk to her in a day or two when i'm not feeling so emotional.

[usahgrad]

I think if she's worried that you're mad at her then she might have some idea of what she said and how much it hurt you...that's just my opinion though, I have no idea what you're mother is like. I think though, if she's asking then talking it over with her won't really start something. But it is definitely your call.

[As You Wish]

She is probably just worried about her little girl. If it is out of character for her- I would chalk it up to pre wedding jitters- moms get them too you know. After all her baby girl is all grown up and going off with some guy. He may be great- but, a mom worries after all.

[Jenn060306]

Last night i had a great talk with my mom. She felt terrible that she had made me feel that way. She had a health scare so she was really happy that everything was going to be fine, so she was celebrating. I totally understand and support her in that. But i did explain that i was a bit embarised by her actions, she felt bad that she made me feel that way.
We talked about the wedding, and she told me she would be tooo busy to get that drunk. She has been super supportive, and is helping me so much with the plans. I feel bad for being so upset with her. I've realized i was reading waaaay to far into it.
Thanks for the support and suggestions. I needed a bit of push into talking to her. I really try to avoid conflict which isn't always the best for me.

[usahgrad]

Awww...I'm glad to hear you worked things out! Now you can get back to focusing on wedding details! :bbmrgreen: