bride doesn't care

[trainjoan]

My daughter is getting married very soon. The time to plan the wedding was just 7 weeks. Now that everything is getting closer, the bride is stressed because she has so much to do. For the last 7 weeks she has sat by while I planned the entire wedding for her. In fact, she said she didn't care what I picked, but I consulted her on most of the decisions trying to have the wedding she would dream of. Now that the wedding is near, she is worried about what mascara to wear, trying on her dress, and writing thank you notes for the shower (last week). I am trying to finalize last minute details for the rehearsal (held at my house) and the wedding and she says I am a nag because I asked her to sit down with me for a few minutes to discuss details. Am I wrong to be so stressed over details when the bride is so obviously unconcerned?

[Mish11]

Thats kinda like me and my mom... usually i'm quite organised, but this whole wedding thing is so overwhelming... we've got about 2 months to go and my mom decided to just start getting everything into high gear.

it's not that i don't want to do the planning or get involved, i think my mom just doesn't understand wots going on in my head right now... when you get engaged its all exciting and new, you can't believ that you finally get to marry the man of your dreams. whether its 2 weeks or 2 years till the big day, it seems like a lifetime.... so planning really doesn't hit you till you start getting nervous.

you're probably not being a nag, but remember that you're not the only one asking her questions and telling her wot needs to be done. trust me, everyone she knows is asking too...

take time out, just the 2 of you. go to breakfast or lunch and talk about everything else EXCEPT the weddding. it'll help you guys realise how much you love and need each other. support is wot every bride needs in abundance.... :)

[trainjoan]

Thanks so much, you helped me see the other side. You are right we need some time to just be a mom and daughter again. Thanks so much for your encouragement.

[usahgrad]

WOW! While I'm worried about what mascara I'm going to wear, I'm much more worried about so many other things. She's lucky to have a Mom like you who is helping out when she seems to be so lax on details. I hope it ends up the way she wants it and doesn't stress the relationship out between the two of you. Good luck!

[trainjoan]

Only 4 days to go.... So many details and so little time. Thanks Kelli - my daughter and I had lunch today and it seemed to help. Just a lot to take care of at the last minute. Today we tackled getting the wedding dress to the church (how to transport) and flower delivery. WE WILL MAKE IT.
Good luck to you Kelli

[Mish11]

Sometimes a little mom and daughter time is all it takes :)
i'm sooooo excited for both of you! only 4 days! WOW! both of you must be so busy and nervous! don't worry it'll be perfect! and don't forget to let us all know how it went and to post the pics!
Best of Luck,
Mish

[meganrenae]

my fiance's sister just got married (engaged in July and married in October). She did NO planning whatsoever... kept telling us all that she had it under control... 1 week before the wedding she still had nothing planned... we all let go of the stress and resentment that we might have had- even though she wasn't thankful at all... we all pulled off a great wedding. I think what it takes when brides don't seem to care, is a lot of love from family members who want to make sure she looks back on her day and smiles. :) it all works out beautifully...
good luck and many blessings!

[LizabethDavis]

I hope everything went okay in this wedding. I think you were right to be upset, but I can see the other side of the coin as well. She didn't want to get herself in an uproar, but then towards then end, she started worrying. I am sure it happens all the time.

[As You Wish]

It is really normal, not that it makes it any easier, that moms and brides have a little falling out just before the wedding. It seems to be especially true if you have been good friends. Weddings are stressful crazy life altering events. Your mother/daughter relationship is forever changing, as is your friendship. A little fight is painful, but will pass with the honeymoon.

Trust me, I went through it, saw my sisters, cousins, friends, and now clients go through it. This too shall pass.