Gonna eb a "mixed family"

[kevinsbride2B]

As I've mentioned in previous posts Kev has been going through a ton of legal stuff for his daughter and custody and a whole pile of stuff. Legal prices are Steep, especially for a family lawyer.
Because of this Kev's going to be moving in with my Mom and I for a while and Jamie every other weekend. I'v too mentioned this before.
I'm getting a little nervous about the "mixed family" thing that's gonna go on in my house.
My Mom and I are very different! Sure we're best friends and all that but when it comes down to things we're black and white.
My Mom like I said I love her but she is a very selfish person, and lazy at that. I on the other hand usually over run myself by trying to be the one to make sure everythign is fine and happy.
I really don't know what's going to happen with Kev moving in. I can't wait to wake up beside him everyday from here on in, until we get out own place and it's all ours. My Mom has already started to complain that things aren't her way.
I don't really know what kind of response I'll looking to get from you ladies, but what I do know is that my stress level is sky rocketing!!! The moving, the surgery and not to mention the upcoming wedding that I seem to be responsible for it all.

[BriansBride07]

So sorry your stressing so much. You have alot on your plate at the time. I think that after Kevin moves in and settles in and you surgory is done and out of the way things will fall into place. It's not going to be easy to say the least, with Kevin moving into your mom's home with you. Believe me I have been there. NO fun at all. Just try and do your best don't try to be the people pleaser all the time as you will get burnt out and it may take a toll on you and Kevin's relationship. Try and bite your tongue when your MOM goes into one of her tirattes (sp) As for the wedding maybe with Kevin moving in with you, you can both start taking on the roles and that should help. I wish you all the best and you will get through it even though at times it will seem like there is no end in site. It's just going to make you stronger as a person and you will have a stronger relationship with Kevin,

[kevinsbride2B]

So sorry your stressing so much. You have alot on your plate at the time. I think that after Kevin moves in and settles in and you surgory is done and out of the way things will fall into place. It's not going to be easy to say the least, with Kevin moving into your mom's home with you. Believe me I have been there. NO fun at all. Just try and do your best don't try to be the people pleaser all the time as you will get burnt out and it may take a toll on you and Kevin's relationship. Try and bite your tongue when your MOM goes into one of her tirattes (sp) As for the wedding maybe with Kevin moving in with you, you can both start taking on the roles and that should help. I wish you all the best and you will get through it even though at times it will seem like there is no end in site. It's just going to make you stronger as a person and you will have a stronger relationship with Kevin,
Thanks so much for the support! I'm just tired and burnt out and it seems like there is no pleasing everyoen in my life. I was even taken on by my mom last night about postponing my surgery. It's not possible, I have to have it, but she doesn't see that right now. She thinks I should postpone it and help out for the move. My dr already bumped everyone else back cause I need to go in first. I started to cry, I couldn't belive my health was second to her not wanting to help Kevin move in!

[BriansBride07]

Thanks so much for the support! I'm just tired and burnt out and it seems like there is no pleasing everyoen in my life. I was even taken on by my mom last night about postponing my surgery. It's not possible, I have to have it, but she doesn't see that right now. She thinks I should postpone it and help out for the move. My dr already bumped everyone else back cause I need to go in first. I started to cry, I couldn't belive my health was second to her not wanting to help Kevin move in!

Aww... So sorry your mom is treating you like this but I can truely relate my mom can be very self centered at times also.. You need the surgory ASAP by the sounds of it or your doctor wouldn't of bumped it up 6 mo. ahead of schedule and your mom needs to realize this.. Just remeber that just as long as you and Kevin don't have a problem with you having your surgory early and you can't help him do all the moving then that is all that matters. I know it easier said then done. I am very much a people pleaser to and it gives me alot of unwanted stress.

[kevinsbride2B]

Kevin has been AMAZING!!!!!!!!! I swear everyday I wake up with another reason why I love this man and why I want to spend the rest of my life with him. He was suppose to go out and get some stuff done tonight to help him get ready to move, but he's coming right over after work to help me. He fully understands about the surgery and why I need it now. I've even enlisted 2 of my guy friends to help him move, and my Grandparents will be coming over to help with the dogs during the whole process.
She's just making excuses. I hate to even say this but it's true, my Mom gets annoyed when I have surgery because I get the attention. It sounds wrong, but sadly it's true. I'll be out of commision and she'll be accountable for keeping up on the hosue work.

[BriansBride07]

She's just making excuses. I hate to even say this but it's true, my Mom gets annoyed when I have surgery because I get the attention. It sounds wrong, but sadly it's true. I'll be out of commision and she'll be accountable for keeping up on the hosue work.

LMAO at the house work part. I haven't even lived with my mom for 13 years and I am the one that goes to her house every 2 weeks and clean her house. B/C she is way to lazy to do it herself. She has every excuse in the book why it is not done. Well at least it's a few extra bucks in my pocket. But I still don't see why she can't do it. I understand that she works 40 hrs. a week but come on now its only the 2 of them and 2 dogs. She really needs to get off her rumpus and clean the house. I have never seen such a mess in my life, when I go there it takes me around 4 hours to clean it's just disgusting.

[kevinsbride2B]

Wel it's good to know that there is someone else in the same boat as me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I went o Kev's place in Saturday night and Sunday morning I called her. She explained to me that she had been on a "cleaning roll" since I left. I though awesome I'll walk into a nice clean house. The only thing I found done was that under our phone we usually have a bunch of papers with #'s on it and all that sort of thing. That was tidied up. If that takes a person 12 hours to do, she needs help!

[countrygirl]

Hey, I am so sorry to hear that you are having probs w your mom. My son and I moved in w my mom after we left his dad three years ago. We stayed there for a year, and it was hard. We got thru it though.

It sounds like Kev will do anything he can for you right now, and that shows that you found a good man.

Good luck to you, and remember, we are always here for you!!!

[BriansBride07]

LMAO that is just to funny. I do hear ya she tidied up the paper's under the phone. Yup I bet ya she thought she accomplished a bunch.. Sounds like my mom she will call me the day before I get there and tell's me you will be so happy I cleaned out the basket with all the bills in it.. I am like ok but there is still 3 more. and moving the paper's into the guest bedroom onto that desk and not putting them into the file cabinet is not accomplishing anything..

[kevinsbride2B]

Hey, I am so sorry to hear that you are having probs w your mom. My son and I moved in w my mom after we left his dad three years ago. We stayed there for a year, and it was hard. We got thru it though.

It sounds like Kev will do anything he can for you right now, and that shows that you found a good man.

Good luck to you, and remember, we are always here for you!!!
Thank you very much! :)
I moved back here after I left an abusive relationship. My Mom and I are great "friends" just not great roomates!
Kev is fabulous. He's taking time off so he can be here with me through my surgery and everything that it will bring.
You girls are all great and I'm so happy I found you all!

[countrygirl]

Thank you very much! :)
I moved back here after I left an abusive relationship. My Mom and I are great "friends" just not great roomates!
Kev is fabulous. He's taking time off so he can be here with me through my surgery and everything that it will bring.
You girls are all great and I'm so happy I found you all!

My mom and I are the same. We have both done some changing since I lived there, and we both agree that while we are now friends as well, there is no way in h3ll that we could live together again.

It certainly is nice to have a man who loves you enought to WANT to take care of you. I am glad that you have him.

And I am glad that you found the site too. It's been a blast getting to read your preps!!

[ElizabethV.]

Hon, you have a lot on your plate! If I was you my stress level would be through the roof as well. Just take things one step at a time and deal with it day to day. I know its hard, but try not to think about ALL that you need to do, focus on the task at hand and remember that everything will come together. Best of luck dealing with everything.

[Ms. Scribbles]

We're in a similar situation-trying to pay off olf credit card bills Petes ex racked up before we even started dating..20 thousand dollars folks...YEP and eh and I have been together almost 4 years and NOW we're finally LMOST PAID OFF with that debt though now we have wedding debt lol. It sucks and he had to move back in with his parents and I stay here on the weekends to see him otherwise we wouldnt because my parents have that "one foot on the floor" rule.

Its always a hard situation and like everyone else I am rooting for you. Just keep in mind it is her house, so her rules, no matter how wacky HAVE to apply if you want to keep the peace because you wouldnt want someone moving into your home and then telling you how to live.

BELIEVE ME you will feel the strain between he and you on some days because you want to pelase them both, but honestly he will have to bend the most just as I have to bend the most ebcause its Pete's parents home.

What Pete and I do when we start feeling overwhelmed is we go away for a weekend; nothing huge. Just stay at a cheap (but not roach or hookerish place!) motel/hotel for a day oe two and have a nice dinner somewhere. Gives us all time away from one another and then we can get back into the groove of things.

It will work out. Just remember to take ALOT of deep breaths.