Many Friends Offended

[Kissy27]

Hi all! I had my bridal shower this past Saturday night, my sister threw one for me. It was really nice, and we had a lot of fun. Later that night though, I started to ask myself why certain people were not there, like my Fiance's sister-in-law, and my co-workers from work, with whom I get along greatly with. Well, I got my answer the next day, when my fiance's mother called bitching at him about his SIL not getting an invitation. I told him that she was on the list. I asked my sister if she went to give her one, and she said that Nadine (a friend of my mother's!) took some and the list to pass out. Well, it turns out that my mother's friend didnt do as she said she was going to do. She missed many people on the list. I was very upset about it, because I knew that these people would be offended. I was even more upset that she didnt even bother to tell me that she didnt deliever them all, as she took it upon herself to deliver them, no one asked her too. Well, there is nothing I can do about that now. But how shall I explain to these people why they didnt get an invitation? I was thinking, that after I put my thank you note on the community channle for the people who did attend, that I would write a little something at the bottom saying how sorry I was for them not receiving their invitation. Or, shalll I just do it in person as I meet them? And, where I come from, not receiving an invitation is enough to make anyone feel offended. Also, should I mention anything to Nadine about how I felt let down? Or should I just let it pass?

[WhiskeyGirl]

Whoa, that was hurtful on Nadine's part! I think there is some major talking that needs to be done. If i were you I wouldn't bite my tongue, you should say something to her! And, as far as the ladies who didn't get their invite, plan another shower and tell them that Nadine was being disrespectful or whatever and that you are very sorry, but there is a party that you would like for them to come to! (Don't say bridal shower, they may take offence to that too! And they may think you are being greedy or something stupid like that! Tell them that gifts are not expected, but be very thankful if you do get gifts.) Anyhow, let them know that there was a mix up and that you are terriably sorry. I wouldn't send out a card, make personal phone calls and visits ASAP and explain what happened! And don't let Nadine get away with this! Tell her how much she hurt you and that this is not acceptable! I wouldn't let her get away with it, I would put her in here place for sure! (Oh and don't invite her to the second party!)

Best of luck with this!!

~CanadianBride~

[CarlosHoney]

Agreed. That's just plain mean.. I mean, there are a lot of things that I simply procrastinate, and don't do, but not passing out invites to someone's shower. The impression that I get is that maybe Nadine is senile, and she needs to be watched. Definitley talk to her, and ask her what happened. Did ninja squirels come and steal the invites? Did an angel descend from heaven and tell her that it was the will of god? Come on, man, that's plain uncool.

If she hasn't called to apologise, she would loose her spot on the guest list.

[Kissy27]

Hi, thanks for the advice. I was unsure of how to handle this. Well, I spoke to her today. She called here looking for my mom, and I told my mom when she was done talking to her, that I wanted to speak to her. I explained to her how hurt I was, that she didnt do as she said she "wanted" to do, and the least she could have done was tell me. I told her, and my mother that from here on, she was not to be involved in any more of my wedding plans. As she really got herself involved. LOL, she thought she was going to help deliver my wedding invitations. My fiance told her not to lay a finger on them. I go back to work tomorrow, so I will get a chance to speak to many of the ladies who did not receive their invitation.

Thanks for the advice!

[neeni13]

Good. Sounds like you were perfectly strong and gentle at the same time. I should think that she also would make her own apologies to those people. MAybe you could have a brunch and invite them to that for "Pearls of Wisdom"

[SueMartin]

Sorry I am new to these boards.. is Nadine family or part of the BP??? because if she is, she shouldnt be...

Apologise in person & invite them to afternoon tea, and make them feel that you DID want them to be there..