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View Full Version : Happy BM's = Happy Bride


WebLady
11-01-2011, 10:46 AM
I saw this on the Savvy Blog today and thought I'd share ...

5 ways to piss off your bridesmaids (http://www.onewed.com/bridesmaids-dresses/blog/5-ways-to-piss-off-your-bridesmaids)

1. Budget-breaking attire: How much would you be willing to spend on a so-so dress you'll probably only wear once? Think very hard about this before selecting the bridesmaids' dresses, unless of course you're footing the bill.

2. Extreme makeovers: There once was a bride-to-be who wanted picture perfect wedding photos. She chose her two sisters to serve as bridesmaids, and one of the sisters always sported glasses. This picky bride-to-be was insistent on no glasses down the aisle, so kindly asked her sister to go under the knife for lasic eye surgery prior to wedding. A bit overboard?? I think so. So don't require such extreme actions on the part of your loving 'maids.

3. Me, me me! Yes, the wedding day is all about you. And everyone knows this (especially your bridesmaids), no reminders necessary. Fight the urge to utter any of the following phrases when working with your bridesmaids; (1) But it's MY DAY!, (2) Excuse me, are you the one getting married? Yea, didn't think so., (3) I don't care if you're sick / busy / at work / interviewing for a promotion / spending time with your grandma / etc., you get here NOW to help me arrange these centerpieces!

4. Unreasonable matching requirements: There's nothing wrong with wanting a cohesive look for your bridal party. But insisting on head-to-toe clones is a bit much... especially if the expense of such coordination is falling on your 'maids' shoulders. If matching shoes is a must in your book, gift these to your bridesmaids. Same goes for jewelry, accessories, etc. And when it comes to your bridesmaids' hair and makeup, give them the freedom to choose their looks. Requesting natural vs. dramatic makeup is OK, but forcing a tight french twist, shimmery pink shadow, red lips and nails on all your gals is NOT.

5. Listing it out: Your bridesmaids' should be your most trusted pals, so treat them this way! No matter what your approach, handing out a list of requirements, expectations, or to do's is a surefire way to tick off your bridal crew.

What other ways can a bride really set off her bridesmaids? What things can she avoid so her 'maids remain in her corner?


What do you think - have any tips on the subject to share?

WebLady
11-01-2011, 10:50 AM
I have always said to make sure the people you ask to stand up with you are close friends that actually want to be there for you. Make sure to be upfront with what you expect of them before they accept the role ... and don't make them feel obligated, let them have an out if they can't or don't want to be involved as a BM. It doesn't mean they don't love you, some people would just rather help out and show their support in other ways.

gwenshack
11-01-2011, 12:20 PM
I have been put in some horrible position as a BM in the past. I rarely felt it was honor - more often I felt I was slave labor forced to fit in a dress that looked more like sausage casing.

So when it came time for me to get married, I spoiled my attendants rotten, paid for all kinds of things for them, and told them to wear whatever they felt comfortable in. No parties needed to be thrown, no taking care of me. All they had to do was show up.

Smurfette
11-01-2011, 01:42 PM
In my industry BM stands for bowel movement so I'm thinking
uh yeah... happy BMs "would" equal a happy bride! ;)

firespirit
11-01-2011, 01:51 PM
I've never been a bridesmaid, so I can't say much on that end.

For our wedding I only had my best friend as my maid of honor and DH's eldest niece as a junior bridesmaid.

My MoH flew in from WI to stand up with me, I paid for the tickets for her and her hubby, she brought the dress that she had already used in her brother's wedding. :).

Maybe it was different because I didn't plan a big wedding anyway so I didn't ask for much from my MoH.