New or Used Wedding Dress?

[hiyatran]

I saw this really gorgeous wedding dress for sale online, it cost only $350 but originally bought for $1200. I can probably bargain it down even more. I spoke with the seller and she just wants to get rid of it because of a bad break up.

I'm not superstitious but my husband is. The wedding is putting a financial burden on our budget and this dress will help a lot. He doesn't want me to get the dress cause he thinks it is bad luck.

I don't want to buy this dress behind my fiance's back but it is gorgeous and it will save us a lot of money. What should I do?

thanks

[WebLady]

You said husband first then fiance'; which is it? Would the dress be for a wedding or a vow renewal? I guess it doesn't matter.

If your significant other is that against it and you can't convince him that it is not going to doom your marriage, then you may want to look elsewhere for a deal.

If it was me, I wouldn't worry about where the dress came from. If it is in good shape and fits and it was something I wanted and it was a good deal, I would go for it.

[hiyatran]

He is my fiance or husband to be.

thanks for the input.

[WBandMe]

I guess if I were you I'd ask him what is more important--saving money, or his superstition? If you were making the decision alone I'd say buy the dress--even a "used" wedding dress isn't THAT used, you know? But if it's something that's really important to him then maybe another dress would be best.

[amisteratwisterandme]

IMO going behind your fiancee's back is a bad start to your marriage. If you feel that strongly about the dress, talk to him again and give him your opinions on it: It's more affordable, you guys will choose how your relationship works, etc.

If he is still against it, I would get a new dress. That's just me though!

[Ptrst]

I agree with PP. Ask your FI which he thinks is more important: avoiding bad luck, or saving that much money. Try putting it in practical, concrete terms - the money that you would save on the dress would allow you to buy X instead, or save X amount of money (not just a general "it's cheaper). But if he won't go for it, going behind his back and getting the dress anyway is a bad idea. I'm not superstitious, but it doesn't take luck to make something like that work out poorly.

[girlggc]

Do not go behind your fiance's back. A marriage should be based on trust and a lie does not give it a very promising start. If it were me, I would talk to him about which is more important, money or superstition.

[OnceABride]

I agree it's a matter you should discuss between you and if your husband to be is REALLY against it, perhaps pursue another avenue? You can find reduced gowns online new. Perhaps a relative already married might let you have hers - get it altered to fit and it would then be 'something borrowed'? My Mom's wedding dress belonged to a cousin. Check out sales racks locally; I got my wedding outfit for about 80% off by watching closely - for a western themed wedding. I have a photo attached, but you'll probably have to click on the link since I haven't figured out how to make it come up with a post!

[wed01]

My very new dress was worn once and placed in a box.

I wished I had explored more options for a used gown or rented one.

[anirow]

I think you should apply your charm and convince him to let you buy that dress.You can tell him that the reason that dress is available at such lower price is that it is in your destiny.