My cousin

[Kacie_bride]

Several months ago I posted about my cousin who is only 17 years old and wants to get married and have a baby. She is in fairy tale land. I don't know if anyone remembers or not. It was awhile ago.

Anyway today is her 18th b-day. On Saturday her and her fiance/boyfriend whatever left and did not come back. She left a note saying that she was getting married Sunday morning and they were going to be in East Texas for a few days and they have jobs in Colorado.

There are some holes in that story. For one, I don't think you can actually get your marriage license until you are 18. Then in Texas there is a two or three day wait (Cindy would know exactly) after you get your license until you can get married. I don't know how you would even get a job in Colorado without going on an interview. She does not even have her high school diploma or any work experience so she would probably not find a decent job anyway.

The whole family is pretty upset about it. She will probably end up pregnant very soon. I, on the other hand, think she is stupid and has now ruined her life. She is in for a rude awakening. I also find it very funny because her mother is a religous freak and always bad mouthed others for being unholy or whatever. Now I want to say look what good it did your daughter. Who knows when you'll see her again and she's in for a life of misery and poverty. Hello welfare!

[MOB Karen]

Yeah, sometimes when you raise your little girls with too much religion and restriction, they will rebel. Looks like this is the case with your cousin. It's hard to tell her that she is ruining her life, because, chances are, she won't listen to anyone. It's a sad situation, but she is going to be learning a hard hard lesson. :bbconfused:

[Kacie_bride]

Yeah, sometimes when you raise your little girls with too much religion and restriction, they will rebel. Looks like this is the case with your cousin. It's hard to tell her that she is ruining her life, because, chances are, she won't listen to anyone. It's a sad situation, but she is going to be learning a hard hard lesson. :bbconfused:

Yeah and nobody can tell her anything anymore. Who knows where she even is now. No way to track her down.

[Kacie_bride]

Well I have an update. She is in Loveland, Colorado (north somewhere of Denver) and they are married now. I am thinking this is all pretty funny because of how stupid she is. From what I hear she has only a few pairs of clothese with her (she didn't even bring a jacket) and the only furniture they have is an air mattress. She called and told her mom that after all their bills were paid they would have $300 left each month for food, gas, and entertainment. I thought that was hilarious. I don't think there will be much room for entertainment on that kind of budget. They will be doing good enough to eat and buy gas on $300.

One thing that really bugs me is that some nursey school up there hired her over the internet. They had never even met her. It bothers me that a childcare facility would do that. They don't know who she is or what she could have done. If I had a child in a school like that and I found that at there would be hell to pay.

[LaceyinPgh]

Well I have an update. She is in Loveland, Colorado (north somewhere of Denver) and they are married now. I am thinking this is all pretty funny because of how stupid she is. From what I hear she has only a few pairs of clothese with her (she didn't even bring a jacket) and the only furniture they have is an air mattress. She called and told her mom that after all their bills were paid they would have $300 left each month for food, gas, and entertainment. I thought that was hilarious. I don't think there will be much room for entertainment on that kind of budget. They will be doing good enough to eat and buy gas on $300.

One thing that really bugs me is that some nursey school up there hired her over the internet. They had never even met her. It bothers me that a childcare facility would do that. They don't know who she is or what she could have done. If I had a child in a school like that and I found that at there would be hell to pay.

Well, good luck to her. That is all I have to say. Hopefully it will work out.

By the way, school districts all over the country are so desperate for teachers, most will hire you over the phone or internet.

[Kacie_bride]

Well, good luck to her. That is all I have to say. Hopefully it will work out.

By the way, school districts all over the country are so desperate for teachers, most will hire you over the phone or internet.

Not in Texas. It is pretty strict. I had to have a criminal background check before I was allowed to substitute. Most districts also require their substitutes to go through a district sponsored training session. Some around here even require you to go to a 3 day course taught at a local junior college. Also everyone at the college I go to has to have a crimnal background check before they are even allowed to go into a classroom to do their observation work. You also have to be finger printed.

I guess it just amazes me because regulations here are so strict on who can or cannot get into the schools.

[AngelinLove]

Wow..Kacie...all I can really say is that I am glad that I am not in that situation!!! I agree that there will not be much room left for entertainment....but then again, how much entertainment does someone with that kind of thinking need? I just hope that they manage to eat and survive!!!

[LaceyinPgh]

Not in Texas. It is pretty strict. I had to have a criminal background check before I was allowed to substitute. Most districts also require their substitutes to go through a district sponsored training session. Some around here even require you to go to a 3 day course taught at a local junior college. Also everyone at the college I go to has to have a crimnal background check before they are even allowed to go into a classroom to do their observation work. You also have to be finger printed.

I guess it just amazes me because regulations here are so strict on who can or cannot get into the schools.

Most places require the background check and the certification (although not all require the cert.) I have had freinds get hired in Nevada, Texas, North Carolina, Vigrinia, Maryland, and Florida just by showing up at job fairs with their portfolios or answering adds in news papers and emailing the basics. Several of the dsitricts paid their moving expenses too.

[WebLady]

... The whole family is pretty upset about it. She will probably end up pregnant very soon. I, on the other hand, think she is stupid and has now ruined her life. She is in for a rude awakening. I also find it very funny because her mother is a religous freak and always bad mouthed others for being unholy or whatever. Now I want to say look what good it did your daughter. Who knows when you'll see her again and she's in for a life of misery and poverty. Hello welfare!

I remember you talking about this a while back. Yeah she is probably making a mistake, but what can you do? Nothing ... right or wrong, she is gonna live her life the way she sees fit and there isn't much you or anyone else can do to stop her.

Yeah, sometimes when you raise your little girls with too much religion and restriction, they will rebel ...

I like the way you put that ;)

All too often kids are pushed towards the very things that their family and society wanted to keep them from. In most cases, I believe that somewhere down the line it is the parents and/or society's fault. No one wants to talk about the issues they just want to cover them up and say things like; Don't do drugs, Don't have sex, You can't date, etc ... but many times the kids just see this as controlling them and they want to rebel. So they are left to find out the truth for themselves, the hard way.

I've known too many ppl (myself included) that have said 'If I knew then what I know now I would have made different choices. But even in that, sometimes you have to go through some rough times to get to where you are suppose to be (if that makes any sense)

Anyway, all you can do is hope/pray for the best for her and move on with your life.

[Kacie_bride]

Oh I am not worried about her. At this point I think it is funny that someone could be so stupid and think they are so smart. I think she is getting what she deserves especially after what she put the family through. Her poor mother, while I do not agree with the way she raised her, did not deserve this. The least she could have done was say she leaving and not sneak out of the house and run off. Her mother ended up in the hospital over it. She was already under the care of psychiatrist. And to top it off her dad is having open heart surgery tomorrow and they could have waited until the surgery was over. So my cousin now is not a part of my family anymore. I hope it gets very cold this winter for her.

[Kacie_bride]

Most places require the background check and the certification (although not all require the cert.) I have had freinds get hired in Nevada, Texas, North Carolina, Vigrinia, Maryland, and Florida just by showing up at job fairs with their portfolios or answering adds in news papers and emailing the basics. Several of the dsitricts paid their moving expenses too.

Here you can teach with an emergency certification, but you have to have the background check before you get an emergency certificate. You also have to attend certification classes. It is pretty easy to transfer your certification from another state to here.

I have heard plenty of times about people getting hired at job fairs. They still meet the administration and a background check has been done before they are certified. Malorie (my cousin) never even spoke on the phone. The first day the met her she started working. That is plain dangerous, especially when dealing with toddlers.

[mj512]

Sadly some people force religion and that could be the cause of her running away. But don't forget there are those of us out there that aren't "religious freaks" we just have a strong faith and believe in it very strongly, but aren't freaks :) Sadly some people give us that name because of i.e. parents who force stuff on their children, instead of teach them in a loving way.

anyways, I am sorry that your cousin is being so stupid like this, I hope that things get better and that she wises up and comes home and realizes how naive she is being

[Kacie_bride]

Sadly some people force religion and that could be the cause of her running away. But don't forget there are those of us out there that aren't "religious freaks" we just have a strong faith and believe in it very strongly, but aren't freaks :) Sadly some people give us that name because of i.e. parents who force stuff on their children, instead of teach them in a loving way.

anyways, I am sorry that your cousin is being so stupid like this, I hope that things get better and that she wises up and comes home and realizes how naive she is being

I agree that some people into religon aren't religous freaks. I consider myself to be a religous person. There are just some people who take it to extreme.

[WebLady]

I agree that some people into religon aren't religous freaks. I consider myself to be a religous person. There are just some people who take it to extreme.

I'm a Jesus Freak, but not in the bad extreme way :p ;)

[bnd94]

This is JMHO. So I am sorry if I offend anyone but you know me I gotta say what is on my mind.

I wish her luck. I don't see her as stupid at all. Everyone is different. She may even view your lifestyle the same as you view hers. It sounds like she is doing what she wants and is happy. Maybe it will work out and maybe it won't, either way at least she has gotten out there on her own and did what is in her heart. Some people need to learn the hard way. Hopefully this will not be the case for her. I don't mean to offend but you sound very jealous for some reason. Especially with the "I hope it gets really cold this winter for her" part. Noone knows what she went through growing up. I know it is your family, but behind closed doors who knows what is going on. I know in my own life I took the hard road too and am very happy I did. I think it makes you a stonger person than those who take the easy road and have Mom and Dad hand them everything they have. I know I will probably get flamed for this but I wanted to offer you a different view on things. Like I said JMHO.

[darkangel090260]

I am sorry but they are not the only ones living on $300 a mouth after bills. Some Months Ross and my self lives off lest then that and we have 3 kids. Ya its hard but it can be done. We believe its more important for me to be home with the children then to have a lot of extras. I fill we have a nice little life and we are making it. Yes when the kid go to school and we find someone to take care of Adara part time I will go back to work will the kids are in school.

[StaceyMc]

I think that all that really matters is that she's happy. Not everyone is going to agree with how others live their life, but that doesn't mean that their choices are stupid.

I feel for her if her family isn't supporting her decision, no matter how different her choices are may be. Running off may not have been the best idea, but like Becky said, who knows what was going on behind closed doors. I wish her luck and I hope that she is happy and has a wonderful life.

As far as hiring her over the internet, do you know for a fact that they didn't do a criminal background check? I'm sure they checked her out before they hired her. They could have fingerprinted her when she arrived in the city where she works. There are a ton of possibilities.

[Kacie_bride]

This is JMHO. So I am sorry if I offend anyone but you know me I gotta say what is on my mind.

I wish her luck. I don't see her as stupid at all. Everyone is different. She may even view your lifestyle the same as you view hers. It sounds like she is doing what she wants and is happy. Maybe it will work out and maybe it won't, either way at least she has gotten out there on her own and did what is in her heart. Some people need to learn the hard way. Hopefully this will not be the case for her. I don't mean to offend but you sound very jealous for some reason. Especially with the "I hope it gets really cold this winter for her" part. Noone knows what she went through growing up. I know it is your family, but behind closed doors who knows what is going on. I know in my own life I took the hard road too and am very happy I did. I think it makes you a stonger person than those who take the easy road and have Mom and Dad hand them everything they have. I know I will probably get flamed for this but I wanted to offer you a different view on things. Like I said JMHO.

No I am not jealous of her at all. In a million years I would not want she has. What I don't like is what she did to her parents. I don't blame her for wanting to get out of her house. I wouldn't have wanted to be there either. I do not agree with the way she was raised but her parents deserved a little more respect than she gave them. She took off right before her father was going to have open heart surgery and left a note. Her mother ended up in the hospital over it, threatening to kill herself. If she would have just come to them and said this is what we are doing then it would be okay with me. Her parents were weird and life wasn't really good, but they were never cruel. If they were she wouldn't be calling them 3 times a day now and begging for them to come visit her. They deserved a little more respect and so did the rest of the family. I treat my parents better and unless my aunt and uncle were cruel and horrible to her, she should have too.

[Kacie_bride]

I think that all that really matters is that she's happy. Not everyone is going to agree with how others live their life, but that doesn't mean that their choices are stupid.

I feel for her if her family isn't supporting her decision, no matter how different her choices are may be. Running off may not have been the best idea, but like Becky said, who knows what was going on behind closed doors. I wish her luck and I hope that she is happy and has a wonderful life.

As far as hiring her over the internet, do you know for a fact that they didn't do a criminal background check? I'm sure they checked her out before they hired her. They could have fingerprinted her when she arrived in the city where she works. There are a ton of possibilities.

Yes I know they did not do a check on her. She has told us that. Her family would have supported her decision if she would have not run off like that. They would not have been happy, but the family would have gone with it. It is not like she is out there tyring to be a stronger person. Like I said, she is calling home 3 times a day begging for her mother to come up there and asking her to send her stuff. If she wants to be on her own then she should be on her own.

And this is for Stephanie: Yes I know they are not the only ones living on $300 after bills. I know it can be done, but she has no idea how hard it is going to be. There was a time we were living on that after bills too. What makes me cringe is that she does not yet understand that it is going to be hard. She is living in a fairy tale land and thinks that she is going to be able to travel and buy designer clothing. This is why I say she is stupid. She has no idea and has been like this her whole life. She has even said she is going to send a plane ticket to her mother to come visit.