Pre engaged?

[NJ_MaryKay_Brittany]

Hi ladies,

See, I never really understood the terms and agreements to being pre-engaged (lol, I say it as if i'm signing a contract). My boyfriend and I are almost a year old and we talk about getting married OFTEN and while I love the idea of marrying him and spending the rest of my life with him- - i'm not sure if i'd be ok with being pre engaged (i guess that's until i learn the terms). So does it mean when you talk about it all the time, with NO set date, but know how many people you want there, colors, and etc?

Help a lady out! what's the scoop?

[angelsrock]

pre-engaged just means he wants to marry you and propose to you but you guys are waiting due to economic or other factors in life. my boyfriend asked if id take this promise ring as a promise that he will one day propose. usually the bf will give u a promise ring until he can get an engagement ring and do a proper proposal. i never thought i'd get pre-proposed to. but it just adds to the memories and is sweet. i didnt even knew it existed. but people used to do that in the olden days when they wanted to get engaged but couldnt afford to. now people get pre-engaged for any reason. it just means your going steady.

[angelsrock]

no u are not preengaged if u just talk about what u want at your wedding. he has to ask u if u will take his offering and wait because either u both or one of u need more time before getting engaged due to whatever reasons. mine is due to the fact i just graduated and need time to start my career getting financially stable before getting into marriage. but it can be any reason

[WebLady]

I don't know that there is any formal definition to what pre-engaged is. I personally never thought of myself as pre-engaged ... a couple of years into our relationship we just talked about getting married a lot. Then the talks got more serious and eventually we started calling ourselves engaged even though there wasn't really any formal engagement. Then a couple of years later we started talking more and more and we finally set a date.

If you are going for traditional then I guess pre-engaged is anytime before the engagement ... there is a time when the marriage talks get more and more serious and both of you know that a formal engagement is coming, but for whatever reasons you haven't gotten there yet ... I guess that would be pre-engaged to me; whether you have a promise ring or something like that or not.

But I am sure others may have a different definition, really it only matters what it means to you and your partner :)

[SkippyNXC]

really it only matters what it means to you and your partner :)

:yeah_that:

i'd say pre-engaged is once you have a plan and intent to get married... whether or not there's a ring or timeline...

[2dBride]

Hmm... We never did have rings. Does this mean we were only pre-engaged? And can you go directly from pre-engaged to married?:yeah_that:

i'd say pre-engaged is once you have a plan and intent to get married... whether or not there's a ring or timeline...

[SkippyNXC]

Hmm... We never did have rings. Does this mean we were only pre-engaged? And can you go directly from pre-engaged to married?

good point but i also said its what it means to u and ur partner too ;)

thats just what it meant to me n FH :eureka:

[WebLady]

Hmm... We never did have rings. Does this mean we were only pre-engaged? And can you go directly from pre-engaged to married?
We never had rings either ;)

[angelsrock]

i would agree that a pre-engagement is the intent on one day getting proposed and married. its just more serious for sure. i think u could go from pre-engaged to married. but i want a real proposal and my bf knows that so he wont skip that. but i suppose with other couples it could happen. esp if your ready to get married at that moment.

[ksherlin]

Hmmm... I posted this first in the pre-engaged thread... Whoops...

I don't think it is anything set. Most of the ladies look at themselves as pre-engaged, because they know they are getting married or engaged, however he hasn't officially proposed.

I think that is the basic. Kinda like the "we know we are getting married, but haven't made that engagement step..."

For me, FH and I had talked about marriage and we had committed ourselves to each other, but our engagement was showing that commitment to everyone else. Our "pre-engaged" was when the idea of marriage was still our secret, but we knew we were going to get married.

Like I said though, it may be different for everyone!:yesnod: No contracts or terms of conditions:yesnod:

[gwenshack]

I considered myself pre-engaged for the months leading up to our official engagement. DH and I had set a date, he had bought the ring, I had gotten my dress, but he was waiting until our trip to Paris so he could propose to me officially while we were there.