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View Full Version : 1 Month to Go: Still No Officiant


nikkiana
07-10-2006, 10:35 PM
Originally, a friend from FL was going to officiate our wedding... Unfortunately, about a month ago, he started having some health problems... He had two heart attacks in a matter of two weeks and had to have a catherization.... Due to money and stress levels and things, he had to bow out of being a part of our wedding... I totally understand where he's coming from and I'm not really upset over it, these sort of things happen...

But... it left me without an officiant.

FH and I are not particularly religious, we sorta used to be, but were burned very badly by the church... It doesn't matter much to us whether it was a JP or a minister, but it does matter some to FH's mother who was full of snide comments when we chose to have the wedding outdoors and instead of in a church... She was only quieted over the fact that it was a minister performing the ceremony. At this point, I don't think she gets a stay because it's like a month and like two days until the wedding and at this point, we'll take anyone with the qualifications that says "Yes, I can do it."

FH has mostly been the one trying to find someone new.... I'm just too stressed with other stuff... Thus far, no luck. Everyone he's called is either busy on August 12th or doesn't do weddings anymore.

I'm getting kinda nervous that the only option I'm going to have is to use my mother's friend who is a JP but doesn't like doing weddings (she's only a JP because she works for the state and the state paid for her license to perform weddings), I know she'd do it for me but I don't want to put her into that position because I know she really doesn't like doing them....

Kacie_bride
07-10-2006, 10:43 PM
Oh honey I feel for you on this one! Poor you! I have to agree, right now you take what you can get. Don't worry about how anyone else feels. I would just call anyone and everyone. Make sure to explain your situation so they do not think you are just a procrastinator. Good luck!

MountainBikeGirl
07-11-2006, 03:43 AM
Hang in there. These things have ways of working themselves out. I was also without an officiant until the last month but it worked out wonderfully. I did not want a religious officiant, even though i am catholic - we couldnt have a catholic wedding because we are from out of state and would have no way to do the required premarital courses.

But, we ended up going with my Grandmas pastor. It was awesome. He was so cool and totally understanding of not wanting the ceremony to be overtly religous. He even wore birkenstocks and looked so cool! he did have a few stipulations - he had to bring in some passages from the bible and said we must do the 'till death do us part' bit. That was nothing and I was happy to oblige him in return for the awesome speeches that he did. He didn't even know us that well but even said things like 'I have had some chance to get to know these two and I know I'll be sitting there at their 25th anniversary - these two have it!'

Moral of the story is, keep your mind open. Even if you thought a pastor or minister was out of the question, there are some really cool ones that can personalize your ceremony just for you. And hopefully you will find someone like I did. I completely feel your stress, so I hope it works out for you. :)

darkangel090260
07-11-2006, 04:45 AM
why not look in to have a friend or family member do it. Just talk to the people at the court house and see what would need to do some state will give a person the right to marrie a couple for a short time. Check in to it that might be one way to do it.

LaceyinPgh
07-11-2006, 08:02 AM
Do what I did. Call your local city or county building to see if there are an JP's in the area who would be intereted in doing it. If not, pull out the yellow pages and start calling churches. Talk to some ministers and see if you can find one who shares your views about what you want. I know that Unitarian churches are usually liberal when it comes to designing wedding ceremonies.

ddzlilangel
07-14-2006, 09:58 PM
i feel your pain.. i have 8 days and still no officiant.. i have called several churches.. and the couple of jp's i have called dont leave the office...i think i am about to take the idea of going through the yellow pages....good luck with yours...

nikkiana
07-24-2006, 06:26 PM
I just noticed that I never posted a follow up to this... Whoops! As of last week, we have an officiant! He was a regular in the kitchen store I used to work at so one of the girls I used to work with suggested that we call him and see if he'd do it and he said yes!

/me dances!

MOB Karen
07-24-2006, 06:52 PM
Awesome!!! Congratulations, Nikkiana!!! See how things always work out! :D

AngelinLove
07-24-2006, 06:52 PM
Congratulations on getting that settled and squared away!!!

WhiskeyGirl
07-24-2006, 07:07 PM
Phew, that's a relief eh?! Glad things worked out for you!! :)

Kacie_bride
07-24-2006, 09:46 PM
Thank goodness! I'm glad you got that taken care of!

The Wedding Diva
07-25-2006, 06:39 AM
That's awesome; Congratulations!

asm198
07-26-2006, 02:21 AM
Yay! I'm glad you got that taken care of!