Gratuity

[Ninedays9]

This isn't the question I couldn't think of, but I did think of something else...

Who do you give gratuity tips to? I was thinking it'd be the minister and the DJs, since they are providing a service rather than a product. (Our reception hall already has a gratuity fee built in, so we're not giving them anything extra.) How much should I give? Is there a standard for that?

[SkippyNXC]

this is the site I used to learn about tipping

http://www.hudsonvalleyweddings.com/guide/tipping.htm

but it looks like the standard is 15-20%

it also says that even tho tips are included in catering package, if the service is exceptional an additional tip should be given...

just remember that 18% tip in ur bill is being split between every employee at ur wedding... if it even gets to them! our site actually adds a $2/plate tip on top of the service charge for the maitre d'/head waiter... and told me that additional tip is nice but NOT expected... if we have money n the service was exceptional we do plan on tipping the wait-staff....

[Ninedays9]

this is the site I used to learn about tipping

http://www.hudsonvalleyweddings.com/guide/tipping.htm


Thanks! And yikes! That's a lot of a tipping! I'm not sure how many people are actually working for the catering. I have only been in contact with one person, and it sounds like she's the main one that does everything or nearly everything. I'm not sure how that works with serving, though. Eh, we'll figure it out.

[SkippyNXC]

yeaaah i feel like u could spend ur entire wedding budget over again just tipping ppl. What I would do tho is decide the highest ur willing to go... get the cash, put it in an envelope... then if the service sucks just take out as needed... otherwise u can just hand them the envelope

tho i guess "tradition" says it's the best man's job to give the tips to everyone? idk i'd only do that if i trusted said best man...

[SkippyNXC]

oh n the only reason i may tip extra to the wait staff is b/c they split the 18% w/the head waiter and on top of that he gets 2 bucks/guest so i feel like he's gettin enough already LOL

[Ninedays9]

Those are good ideas. I agree on the best man thing... we do trust him, otherwise he wouldn't be best man, but I think we'll just give the tips so we know it goes straight to the right person. It's just one less step to worry about.

[Ninedays9]

Is it standard to give cash for the gratuity, or would it be acceptable to give a check?

[lilmsjess]

if you give a check, then it's up to the head person to disperse it ;)

that said, that still doesn't mean that every person will get "more"...it would probably still get divided the way the venue feels that it should.....

for us, i have the intention of tipping the persons running the buffet(we switched from plated), the woman at group sales, b/c she might be getting paid, but she still had to take a saturday off and a friday evening for a rehearsal to make sure all is well....i think we have an 18% gratuity in our catering bill.....i really don't know, as the catering section of my packet, doesn't state the amount, i'm just guessing which is probably just as bad lol.....


if you can think of stuffing the extra envelopes, then honestly, i'd find out how many people will be working, put however much extra you think into each envelope, and then as one said, take away if need be.....and give the envelopes to someone who would be willing to do the footwork....that is what we are doing....fh's stepmom will be the one who hands out the individual tips, as since she and FFIL aren't married, she said it's not her place to assume any parental duties(which is good, b/c FMIL and FFIL would probably be upset about it).....