Would it be improper of me?

[dylansmom011908]

Forgive me if there is another thread that has this answer...

but i was wondering.. is it wrong of me to only invite the wedding party/participants to the rehersal dinner.. without allowing them to bring a guest.

We're trying to cut down costs and they will cut our costs in half!

and then there's the issue that some of the wedding party mbrs are family and they have wives.. so .. do i have to invite them as well because they are technically family.. but then i'm telling other's they can bring a date..

any advice would be great

[MrsDM]

Whether or not its wrong, I'm kinda doing the same thing! If a member of the party has a s/o that has been apart of their lives for some time, I don't see anything wrong with them bringing him/her. However, if somebody is going to bring a guest, just to bring a guest, I don't think its necessary.

Plus, they have the wedding to bring a guest. The rehearsal is a smaller gathering too, I would be afraid that such a guest would feel uncomfortable, or you or your FH.

[f77g4]

I think it is only proper if they are engaged/married/living together to have them bring a date....thats how I'm viewing the wedding itself. Not much of an issue with the rehearsal dinner since my bridesmaid is married to one of the groomsman and then there is just my sister and FBIL and since my family doesn't care for my sister's BF well he's not invited.

[Boceifus]

On one hand I was a s/o that was brought to a rehearsal dinner by an attendant, but at the same time I was also very close with the bride and groom and had just spent the day before with the "groom's day" (bachelor party replacement). I definitely understand not wanting the added costs though, especially for something like this. I would suggest keeping it the wedding party and as few people as possible. Maybe make a compromise for those you'd rather not have there and mention something about some kind of get together afterward.

[WebLady]

Whether or not its wrong, I'm kinda doing the same thing! If a member of the party has a s/o that has been apart of their lives for some time, I don't see anything wrong with them bringing him/her. However, if somebody is going to bring a guest, just to bring a guest, I don't think its necessary.

Plus, they have the wedding to bring a guest. The rehearsal is a smaller gathering too, I would be afraid that such a guest would feel uncomfortable, or you or your FH.This was pretty much my thoughts too :)

[WBandMe]

I think it's okay. Since our BP is only two people, it's not a huge issue for me, but what we're doing is inviting BM (FH's brother) without a guest, and inviting my MOH (my cousin) with her boyfriend since she won't really have anyone there. I figure that since BM is going to be with his immediate family, he doesn't need a guest, but MOH will be the only one there not immediately part of either of our families and, especially depending on where she sits, she may be more comfortable having her boyfriend there.

[ChristineLS]

In our case, we're only inviting the SO's of guests and attendants if they are integrated in our own social networks too... we're kind of a tight group at this point, so if someone's a stranger, there is usually a reason for it. I don't know if that sort of thinking is applicable to you - it's just that most of the SO's of our friends became our friends too, and if they didn't... we probably don't like them and don't want them at the wedding (or rehearsal dinner) for reasons specific to the person in question.

[LoveFace917]

I am only planning on having BP and close family at the rehersal. We are keeping it small, the wedding is where everyone else will be. It is where the BP gifts and such will be given. I don't think people would be offended if they weren't invited to it. It is supposed to be smaller than the actual wedding.

[muguet]

We're inviting the guests and SO's of everyone who is immediate family and bridal party. However I don't know if I can say for sure that it's "wrong" not to invite them.