Unity Candle?

[MOB Karen]

Just curious to see how many of us are using or not using a unity candle.

[LaceyinPgh]

We didn't do the unity candle. We really tried to stay away from anything too traditional in our wedding. But for the ceremony we wanted it to be as short as possible. To do that we completely cut out the unity candle.

[WhiskeyGirl]

We didn't do a unity candle either as we were supposed to be outside. We kinda did a unity rose kind of thing when both our mom's layed a rose at the beginning of the ceremony. Kind of a way to remember those who passed adn kind of a way to symbolize two families coming together!

[Amber818]

We like the idea a lot so we will be incorporating that plus the "hand ceremony" in our wedding. I too want the ceremony to be very short and I was talking with the officiant she said both things would be no more than a few minutes each!

[katieandalex]

Nope not me...we are doing a very quick JOP ceremony.

[Kacie_bride]

Yes we are doing a unity candle. My ceremony will probably last about 30 minutes. To me, the most important part is the actual ceremony. I also consider myself to be religous and my ceremony is a religous one. I am, however, cutting out some things from the ceremony in the Lutheran hymnal. We are not having communion and we are not going to do any kneeling.

[cowboysbride]

We are having a unity candle lighting...I feel it is very important to our mothers (who will light the tapers) and to us to join us all together by the lighting of the candle. Our song is "I Cross My Heart" by George Strait...I want a very meaningful but short ceremony because when nervous I giggle or cry and I don't want to be up there snorting or sobbing like a baffoon!

Our minister is a long time family friend of Eric's family, Scott was in the picture before Eric was even born...Eric was in Scott's wedding...and Scott is Church of Christ and it means alot to us to have Scott officiate.

[CindySue]

We did the sand ceremony instead. It was really easy, took maybe 5 minutes and instead of a burnt candle, we have a pretty little heart shared vase with the sand in it to look at. BTW - the design of the sand when it was poured turned out soooo neat!!!
ETA - if you have children, they can also be a part of this too with their own color of sand.

[MOB Karen]

I also think it's important to Amber to have me included in her unity candle ceremony. I like the whole idea of bringing both family's together.

I also like the idea of the sand ceremony, because I feel like every time I looked at the sand container long after the wedding was over, it would make me feel warm and fuzzy all over again. That would be nice.

[cowboysbride]

Okay clue the clueless cowgirl in...what is the sand ceremony?

[CindySue]

It similar to the unity candle only you pour different colors of sand from separate vases to a larger one. Its like the sand art thing you can do.
You can check it out here:
http://wedsite2002.tripod.com/sand_ceremony.htm

[cowboysbride]

It similar to the unity candle only you pour different colors of sand from separate vases to a larger one. Its like the sand art thing you can do.
You can check it out here:
http://wedsite2002.tripod.com/sand_ceremony.htm

How cool! Thanks Cindy!

[countrygirl]

We are having a unity candle lighting...I feel it is very important to our mothers (who will light the tapers) and to us to join us all together by the lighting of the candle. Our song is "I Cross My Heart" by George Strait...I want a very meaningful but short ceremony because when nervous I giggle or cry and I don't want to be up there snorting or sobbing like a baffoon!

Our minister is a long time family friend of Eric's family, Scott was in the picture before Eric was even born...Eric was in Scott's wedding...and Scott is Church of Christ and it means alot to us to have Scott officiate.

OUr song is I cross my heart too!!!!!!!

But I don't know that we will have that played while we light the candle. We haven't picked the music for our ceremony yet. We are having a full Catholic Mass, so it is going to be very traditional.

[CindySue]

How cool! Thanks Cindy!
I thought it was too. It turned out very well. You can match the sand to your wedding colors. It was just something different.

[countrygirl]

I thought it was too. It turned out very well. You can match the sand to your wedding colors. It was just something different.

I thought about that, but my fam is nuts, and we may end up w sand all over the house!!!!!!!!!!:bbmrgreen:

[MOB Karen]

I thought about that, but my fam is nuts, and we may end up w sand all over the house!!!!!!!!!!:bbmrgreen:


LOL!! You're hilarious!!!:bblol:

[countrygirl]

LOL!! You're hilarious!!!:bblol:

Yeah, well, looks aren't everything!! hahahahahahahahaha

[cowboysbride]

Yeah, well, looks aren't everything!! hahahahahahahahaha


Someone's feelin better today! Glad to see it!!!!!!!!!!!

[countrygirl]

Someone's feelin better today! Glad to see it!!!!!!!!!!!

I am, thank you. Much better today.

[CindySue]

I thought about that, but my fam is nuts, and we may end up w sand all over the house!!!!!!!!!!:bbmrgreen:
When we were cleaning up after the ceremony, we lifted the place mat we had the sand stuff on and there was a lot of sand under it. Mostly MY color!!!!:bbredface:

[AngelinLove]

A sand ceremony is when the bride and groom, or sometimes bride/groom/ and children, all take different colored sand and pour them from smaller containers into one larger container. It is supposed to symbolize the joining together and blending of two people or a family!!!

Joel and I will be doing a hand ceremony, but no unity candle, since we are getting married outside!!!

[septemberbride06]

I have never heard of it either, but I'm excited to find out because we have been looking for something diffderent. My mom, and step-mom are both very controlling women, and they both want a part,along with the groom's mother... It's just a mess!

[septemberbride06]

okay, what's a hand ceremony?

[AngelinLove]

A hand ceremony is where you hold your partners hand, or sometimes you just place your hands on theirs, and there is a whole reading/ceremony around it. Here are 2 examples, but there are many ways of doing it:


Version 1:

Please face each other and hold hands, so you may feel the gift that you are to one another.
These hands holding you on your weddding day are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love for you as you promise to love each other today, tomorrow and forever.
These are the hands that will work alongside yours as together you build your future.
These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, and with the slightest touch will comfort you like no other.
These are the hands that will hold you when fear and grief wracks your mind.
These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes, tears of sorrow and tears of joy.
These are the hands that will tenderly hold your children.
These are the hands that will help you to hold your family as one.
These are the hands that will give you strenth when you need it.
And lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch.

Version 2
_____, please turn _____ hands, palms up, so you may see the gift that they are to you.
These are the hands of your best friend, strong and vibrant with love, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as he promises to love you all the days of his life.
These are the hands that will work alongside yours, as together you build your future, as you laugh and cry, as you share your innermost secrets and dreams.
These are the hands that will love you and cherish you.
These are the hands that will wipe the tears from your eyes: tears of sorrow and joy.
These are the hands that will comfort you in illness, and hold you when fear and grief wrack your mind.
These are the hands that will tenderly lift your chin as you raise your face to look into his eyes: eyes that are filled with his overwhelming love and desire for you.
____, please turn _____'s hands, palms up, so you may see the gift that they are to you.
These are the hands of your best friend, young and carefree, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as she pledges her love and committment to you all the days of her life.
These are the hands that will hold you tight as you struggle through difficult times.
These are the hands that will comfort you in sickness and console you in grief.
They are the hands that will love you and cherish you through the years.
These are the hands that will give you support as she encourages you to chase down your dreams.
Together as a team, everything you wish for can be realized.
___ and ___, please lift your hands for the blessing.
God, bless these hand that You see before You this day.
Help these hands to continue building a relationship founded in Your grace.


There is also the rose ceremony, and here is an example of that:

Rose ceremony:
the Bride and Groom give each other a Rose. Two roses are all that is necessary. The Rose Ceremony is placed at the end of the ceremony just before being pronounced husband and wife. In the old language of flowers, a single red rose always meant "I love you". The Rose ceremony gives recognition to the new and most honorable title of "Husband and Wife". "Your gift to each other for your wedding today has been your wedding rings - which shall always be an outward demonstration of your vows of love and respect; and a public showing of your commitment to each other. You now have what remains the most honorable title which may exist between a man and a woman - the title of "husband" and "wife." For your first gift as husband and wife, that gift will be a single rose.
In the past, the rose was considered a symbol of love and a single rose always meant only one thing - it meant the words "I love you." So it is appropriate that for your first gift - as husband and wife - that gift would be a single rose. Please exchange your first gift as husband and wife. In someways it seems like you have not done anything at all. Just a moment ago you were holding one small rose - and now you are holding one small rose. In some ways, a marriage ceremony is like this. In some ways, tomorrow is going to seem no different than yesterday. But in fact today, just now, you both have given and received one of the most valuable and precious gifts of life - one I hope you always remember - the gift of true and abiding love within the devotion of marriage. _________ and _____________, I would ask that where ever you make your home in the future - whether it be a large and elegant home - or a small and graceful one - that you both pick one very special location for roses; so that on each anniversary of this truly wonderful occasion you both may take a rose to that spot both as a recommitment to your marriage - and a recommitment that THIS will be a marriage based upon love. In every marriage there are times where it is difficult to find the right words. It is easiest to hurt who we most love. It is easiest to be most hurt by who we most love. It might be difficult some time to words to say "I am sorry" or "I forgive you"; "I need you" or "I am hurting". If this should happen, if you simply can not find these words, leave a rose at that spot which both of you have selected - for that rose than says what matters most of all and should overpower all other things and all other words. That rose says the words: "I still love you." The other should accept this rose for the words which can not be found, and remember the love and hope that you both share today.
__________ and ________, if there is anything you remember of this marriage ceremony, it is that it was love that brought you here today, it is only love which can make it a glorious union, and it is by love which your marriage shall endure."

[LizabethDavis]

Yes, we will be having a Unity Candle Ceremony...Here is our Unity Candle:

http://i81.photobucket.com/albums/j220/06172006/Unity.jpg

http://i81.photobucket.com/albums/j220/06172006/Unitycandle.jpg

[rainbowtreat]

We also did the sand ceremony. You can see pictures of it if you look at my pictures site. The link is in my journal. We had 4 different colors of sand one each for me , Nicholas, my son, and my daughter. I didnt have it worked out who was going to go first or naything it just fell into place when we did it. My youngest poured his first then my daughter then me and then my Husband. It turned out Beautifuly. And I had 3 small bottles all set to go before hand and gave one to my mom and one to his mom and grandmom. I loved it because it made the kids a big part of the ceremony. ANd Lizabeth did a great reading during it. If I can find it I will post it.

[LizabethDavis]

Here is the sand ceremony I did for Nicholas and Gwen!

Now before Nicholas and Gwen proclaim their love for one another they would like to take a moment to include their children in a sand ceremony.
Nicholas and Gwen, today you are making a life-long commitment to share the rest of your lives with each other and honor your children Jessa and Dean as well. Your family relationship is symbolized through the pouring of these individual containers of sand; one, representing you, Nicholas and all that you were, all that you are, and all that you will ever be, one representing you, Gwen, and all that you were and all that you are, and all that you will ever be and another container for Jessa and yet another for Dean.
These are children who will share in this marriage. The gathering of this new family will have a deep influence upon them. We realize that in order for the home to be a happy one, it is essential that there be love and understanding between the children and the adults being married.

[WhiskeyGirl]

That is a very sweet reading Gwen and Lizabeth!!

[rainbowtreat]

Thank you Shawna. It is one of my most favorite parts of the ceremony. The sand ceremony went perfectly. Lizabeth waited untill we were into it before she read that piece and it went perfectly.

[lisa0707]

Yes. Originally I didn't want to, but since Corey's mom is deceased we needed a way to include his two closest aunts. His Aunt L (who is like a second mother to him) will light the unity tapers w/my mom and his Aunt D (his mom's twin) will light a candle in her memory.

[SoontobeMrsClark07]

We're using a unity candle. I havent liked any I've seen so I'm making one myself. Jonathan said that all of this DIY stuff will make the wedding more personal for us eventhough a lot of our guests wont know its DIY.

[ikkin510]

We made our unity candle. Just bought plan candles from walmart, nice stands and a string of leaves/berrys to lay around it. It looks great!
I'm still trying to figure out how to word the info about the unity candle into my ceremony. Brandi sent me an idea, but I can't figure out how to shorten it. Anyone have any more ideas they can PM me? Thanks! (Sorry if I hijacked!!!)

[nikkiana]

I didn't really feel that the unity candle was particularly essential to my ceremony.... Nor particularly appropriate for an outdoor ceremony...

[Crystal05]

Yes, we used a unity candle. I loved the idea. We had both our mother's like the individual candles that we used to light our one candle. I also liked the idea of keeping the individual ones lit to still signify our individual lives as well as our married life.

[PurpleFlower]

we are doing the unity candle. My mom got me this really neat holder for it but I can't post pics yet so just keep an eye on my journal!

[SoontobeMrsClark07]

Some people who do outdoor ceremonies do sand instead of a candle. The bride and groom each have a jar full of sand in the color of their choosing and they both pour the sand into the jar at the same time and it creates a design that interlocks. This is a good idea especially for outdoor ceremonies because you can put a cap on it and it wont blow out... you can also keep it as a momento from your wedding. I've seen it done a lot.

[KristyGirl]

We had a unity candle. Our minister said he rarely does ceremonies without them anymore, so we figured why not?

[mariaandmanish]

Not having an american/christian ceremony, so definitely not having a unity candle. In the hindu ceremony, they do something where they tie the scarfs of both the bride and groom together. Then we walk around a fire, tied together while the priest recites a series of "vows". It symbolizes the commitment to each other, as well as the joining of two families together.

[ladymelissa]

We had a u-candle. I love that idea.