engagement ring ???s

[fingers crossed]

Alright ladies... you've already got them on your fingers, so I figure you're the best to ask all my questions to!

I'm fairly certain a proposal is in my future and I've indicated that I want to be involved in the ring picking out process. We live in a small town and purchasing the ring here isn't really something I'm looking forward to - I have one of those toxic "friends" that owns a jewlery store and I can just see it being a horrible experience. So... I think I'm going to ask him to take me to NYC so we can go to the diamond exchange. Good idea or bad idea? I'm a darn good negotiator... can I put my skills to use there?

[WhiskeyGirl]

This is my opinion and only my opinion so by no means do you have to listen to me. It is my opinion when a man asks you to marry him, a question that he wishes to ask you, most of the time by surprise. The ring is a gift From him. The ring is, what I think, part of the way that he shows his love for you. He does this by picking the ring out by HIMSELF, in most cases.(This doesn't mean that the amount he loves you is represented by the size of your ring, but rather how much care he puts into picking it out and presenting it to you.) Now this is where my opinion comes into play, if you love the man enough to marry him, then you should be willing to let him pick out the ring and have confidence in him that he can pick something out that you like. I also knew that a proposal was in my future, so I told my fiance what I liked, for example I said that I wanted a simple ring, that was not too big. However, he listened to the simple part but bought me a .33 carrat Canadian Diamond ring. (I thought it was too big, but still loved him for picking the ring out by himself and knowing me so well that I loved the ring and him even more!) It is in my opinion that you should allow him to pick out the ring by himself or with the help of a friend... Perhaps a close mutual friend who knows what it is that you like. This way, he can surprise you when he proposes.

As far as your "toxic friend", one question, if they are so toxic then why are you friends with them?

[totalia]

Wow. I actually agree with something Canadianbride said.

[Jenny]

I agree with Canadianbride and I think that the roc doesn't matter in the engagement proposal....

[fingers crossed]

Wow... that's the kind of response that makes me never want to venture back to this site, but I guess before I do I'll explain a few things...

I have very specific feelings about this subject as well. I didn't come here to be told that I'm wrong. I came here to ask a question about the diamond exchange. Please do not pass judgement on how my boyfriend and I conduct ourselves.

My boyfriend owns an exceptionally successful steel business. I have a car dealership. He's going to propose with a stainless steel ring he's making at his shop because we both move steel. He's spent a lot of time thinking about the proposal and I will be so moved by the entire thing. I personally feel more honored that he wants to include me in the decision making process. He clearly knows me well enough to know that is what works best in our relationship. He also knows that I would like to wear a diamond engagement ring. I think he also knows that you don't screw around with $10k purchases.

The toxic "friend" is a business aquaintance. She is a friend because like all the people I know from a business sense are friends. That's how it works when you live in a small town.

My question centers around the diamond exchange and whether anybody has had experience there. If anybody would like to comment on that, I would be much appreciative. If anybody else has a problem that I'm helping pick out the ring, they can listen to their mother's advice that if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.

[WhiskeyGirl]

I sincerely apologize. You had asked for an opinion and what I gave you was strictly that. It is not something that you have to go by, or even listen to! Again I apologize, you did not allow us to know the whole story, so we gave an opinion based on what you had told us.