etiquette on inviting non-married significant others?

[tk93]

What's the proper etiquette on inviting significant others of friends who are not engaged or married? To be more specific, here're the situations I'm talking about-

1. The gal is a good friend of FH's from HS that I've only met once for about 5 minutes in the past 3.5 years we've been together. FH hasn't been in touch with her in ages, but insists she must be invited. She has a live-in BF that she's been with for years, but we don't know him because they live across the country.

2. A good friend just started dating his coworker. We've only met her once and didn't particularly like her all that much, but she now lives with him.

There are more, but these are good representatives of the type of relationships I'm unsure about. Do we invite the SOs?

[gwenshack]

I think if people live together it would be important to invite the SO. FH and I live together, and did before we got engaged, and I think I would have been hurt if he had been invited to a wedding and I wasn't. I wouldn't have said anything about it, but inside I would have been disappointed.

[WBandMe]

If they're married, engaged, OR live together, the partners need to be invited. Beyond that, it's up to you. Some people say any SO counts, but it's your call. I'm not inviting any SOs that haven't been together for more than 6th months, personally.

[Mrs.Goff]

Not sure what etiquette calls for.

Personally, I decided on a person by person basis.

IMO, it's up to you. If you don't want them there then don't invite them. But don't be upset if your friend decides to decline as well.

If you want them there and your guest list can accommodate them then by all means invite them.

[sandy03]

As a general rule I believe that live-ins should be included because living together is a significant relationship, but whatever you decide to do for one you really need to do for everyone out of fairness.

[ChristineLS]

We have the good fortune to be friends with both halves of most of the couples that we know. Therefore, people who we would have invited anyways happen to be married/live with each other/seriously involved.

Except one friend, who is not living with an SO we *really* can't stand. So we're inviting only half of the couple. Oops.

We run more into a problem where we are really good friends with a brother, and good friends with the other, but not quite so much that we'd invite him. I think we probably would, but we'll see.

[bridaltrack]

First and foremost its your wedding--you are free to invite anyone you wish, or not invite those you wish.

When unmarried people live together you have 3 options:

1. Invite the one you are closest to and include " And Guest"

2. Send 2 invitations--one to each individual.

3. Include both their names on one invitation.

Again, its your wedding any option is acceptable and you don't have to treat each couple the same.