Anyone sick of their fiances

[Chasity]

I am so excited about getting married, but I am getting so irritated with the man! Tell me things are going to get better after the wedding. He doesnt do much at home, he works and goes to school, but is is too much to ask to have him help me around the house or wash a few bottles, maybe even get up with his daughter once in a while. If i am being mean someone tell me cuz i am PISSED:censored:

[WebLady]

It is hard to give you advice without knowing all the details. But I know many couples that go through things like this after having a baby. I think Carrie (LavenderNuptials) had a problem with something similar not too long ago.

I would talk (calmly) to your FH and tell him how you feel and ask him to help. Sometimes guys just think you have it under control, especially with kids. I don't know how old you and your FH are or how old the child is, but sometimes neither of you are ready for the responsibility of a baby and that can cause problems. But whatever the problem is, communication is the only way to get it out ... whether you get what you want is another story.

Best wishes :D

[LizabethDavis]

It does really depend on what kind of situations you are talking about. Are they situations that were there before the baby and now are just worse because you are stressing about something?

I think that just about anything can be worked through, if you want to put the effort in. My FH and I have been through A LOT of hard times in the beginning of our relationship, but now we have worked past them and we are getting married in a little over a month. You need to identify your problem (the REAL problem) and then think of what you need to do to solve that problem and then do it! ~ I hate to sound like a marriage counselor by saying that, but that's really what needs to be done!

Good luck and Best Wishes!

[shawnsgirl]

Hello...I know how your feeling right now..I've been through that my self. It's hard raising a child ecspecially infants. Not having many of the details at hand but I know a lot of men are born in with the ideals of the women take care of the kids, cleaning etc. Honestly, it's too much for one person to do. I would suggest talking to your FH. I would suggest approaching him something like this..."I'm feeling so exhausted lately and overwhelmed with taking care of our child and the housework..." Can we find a way to work together on these things?" and go from there. I also have to agree that there seems to be some underlying issues here too..Perhaps I 'm reading betweent the lines, but it's just want I'm sensing.. I think you both need to sit down and figure out what's really going on..Also, Having a child put SO much more strain on a relationship...The older they get believe it or not the harder it is. Having a child changes the relms of any relationship and is not in any means easy. THe other comment you wrote that I didn't like is that he says it will all change after the wedding....That's the worst!! A wedding, a vow, a marriage is not going to rid a person of their faults. A person is not going to change for the better because of marriage. It's surely not going to get him to help out more around the house! I'd be willing to bet that if your wedding was next week you'd be still stuck with the middle of the night sessions with you child while he' s off in dream world. My advice talk with him and see about some counseling! I hope this helps and I wish all the best for you!

[CindySue]

Me and Brian also started bickering more right after we started planning the wedding. Things did mellow out the closer it got to the wedding some.
Good Luck!

[Cwpri]

I was just in your shoes, fh and I live together we have a daughter together I have two children from a previous marriage. FH works and attends classes for the Fire Department. So one day, I got sick of the BS and I flat out told him that just because he works and goes to school doesn't mean he can just sit around and expect me to be at his beckon call and do everything else. I told him to get off his lazy a** and do stuff himself. If I can work, go to school (2 degrees at that), take care of children, pay bills on time, keep the kids appointments, get up at 5:00 with our daughter and get the kids up for school at 6a.m and clean house on a daily basis then so can he, there is no excuse. I also told him that, there are times where I felt I was going to crack but still managed to keep myself together, that I would like to have a night or two during the week for myself to do what I want to do.

You know what happened?

I got my way. He can't make anymore excuses. Now, if I know he's sick then I don't mind doing everything. I can tell when he fakes being sick too. So he knows you play sick you stay in bed, no going anywhere, no doing anything...he can't stand that so he doesn't do it.


So my best advice is to lay it flat out on the table for your fiance to understand that you need help too and that you are in need of help. or just give him the same schpeal that I typed above. Whatever you have to do to get help from him.