Wedding Picture Disappointment

[RosieAngel]

When we discussed it, DH and I decided that it was really important that we not take pictures together before the wedding, so as not to spoil the surprise and diminish the experience. Well, after the ceremony and before we took pictures as a couple, there were lots of hugs and kisses, and my hairstyle got wreaked. I had no idea, since I was too happy and caught up in everything. The same goes for DH, my bridesmaids, everyone!

While the ceremony pics are amazing and gorgeous and I have great pics of myself with my dad and friends, I look like a drowned rat, or rather, a happy rat that just won a swimming race across the English Channel in all of my pictures with DH. I also looked like a wet rat throughout the reception, only realizing that my hair was a mess after the bouquet toss.

I would go and get pictures taken in a studio with DH if my wedding dress hadn't been ripped to all hell while I was dancing with his clumsy uncle and my drunk best friend. But I took it to seamstresses, and nobody wants to fix it. It's just too much trouble, which is understandable, as the dress was a cheap DB-special and I'm freakishly short, so it can't exactly be passed on to someone else to enjoy. If I have a daughter, she can play dress-up with it, but that will be its only use.

I'm really sad about this. I paid $60 to get my short hair styled, and I feel like I was ripped off. Then again, what hairstyle holds up to being smashed against Aunt Donnella's massive bosoms? Maybe my expectations of bullet-proof hair were unrealistic...

I feel like everyone except me got to be a beautiful bride, and I ended up looking far worse than I usually do on my wedding day.

[amisteratwisterandme]

I am so so sorry you feel that way. I have seen your pictures and thought they were beautiful!!

[RosieAngel]

Thank you, but the pictures you saw were the ones that my friends took for free. I noticed the messy hair the reception photos they took and figured that my hair must have gotten messed up during the first dance, but this didn't bother me much, because I was sure that my hair looked fine for the formal couple's pics that were taken after the ceremony but before the reception...

I guess I was wrong. :sob:

I think I'll just frame the picture my FIL's GF took of the recessional. It's the only passable photo of the two of us together from the entire wedding.

I'm just kind of mourning the loss of money - my photographer cost me nearly $2,000, and, while there are a lot of gorgeous pictures she took, my stupid hair ruined all of the formal shots of us. Part of me wants to blame her for not suggesting that I might want to freshen up after getting hugged, kissed, and slobbered over - after all, she was getting paid, what, $500 an hour? I don't even think I pay my doctor that much for a full physical! But that's not fair, really. It was my responsibility to look after my appearance, and it didn't occur to me to.

[Ohio888Bride]

Rosie,

If it makes you feel any better, I felt the same way about my hair when I saw my pix. It also didn't help that I had to get my hair cut two months before the wedding and it was wayyyyyyyyy shorter than it had been.

I did love the pix that you posted, but I know how you feel. When people say they like my pix, I want to slap them. :icon_barbar: I guess my hair looked good to those who didn't know how it was supposed to look. LOL!

You were a beautiful bride!

[RosieAngel]

Rosie,

If it makes you feel any better, I felt the same way about my hair when I saw my pix. It also didn't help that I had to get my hair cut two months before the wedding and it was wayyyyyyyyy shorter than it had been.

I did love the pix that you posted, but I know how you feel. When people say they like my pix, I want to slap them. :icon_barbar: I guess my hair looked good to those who didn't know how it was supposed to look. LOL!

You were a beautiful bride!

Aww, thanks! :hug: I'm sorry this happened to you too... and I'm sure that it's exactly like what you've said. You know what you were supposed to look like, dagnabbit, and everyone else just sees a beautiful bride.

This does make me feel better about sending pics to friends and family.

[mitch]

You looked lovely Rosie. At least You have loads of pictures to look back on. I've got about 20 to look through. :(

Look back on each misplaced hair and think of the person who did the hugging. Those hugs are priceless.

[RosieAngel]

You looked lovely Rosie. At least You have loads of pictures to look back on. I've got about 20 to look through. :(

Look back on each misplaced hair and think of the person who did the hugging. Those hugs are priceless.

Aww! That is so sad! :( I'm surprised that none of your friends were camera-happy.

You're right. Better to have messy hair and hugs than to look pristine and have no hugs. I'm sure you've heard it a bagillion times on these forums already, but you're so wise, Mitch! :hug:

[gwenshack]

Rosie -

You looked awesome in the pictures I saw! Sure, maybe your hair wasn't exactly how you wanted it to be in the moment, but I bet anybody else who looks at those pics won't even notice. They'll notice your smile, your wedding day glow, the people surrounding you out of love - the hair will be the last thing anybody will see! I think we're always more critical when we see ourselves, but you had a wonderful day and memories (and photos) that will last a lifetime!

:)

[saltyveruca]

She was getting paid, what, $500 an hour? I don't even think I pay my doctor that much for a full physical!

I just have to point out that, no, your photographer was not getting paid $500 an hour. The actual wedding day is the EASIEST part of a wedding. It's the preparation, the processing, and the cost that goes into running a business that you're paying for. Not the hours worked on a wedding day! Most photographers make less than $15-$20 an hour when it's all said and done.

Anyway, it stinks that you're not happy with your pictures. I am ALWAYS making sure everyone looks good in the formals, telling family members to take off their sunglasses, get that piece of lint, straighten the skirt, etc...so I am kind of surprised your photographer didn't point out your hair. Maybe she didn't think it looked that bad?

Can you ask her to see if it's fixable in Photoshop? She might be able to take your hair from your friend's photos and put it on the others. Also, if you haven't done so already, TELL HER. She may have something she can do about it, or she may offer to do an additional shoot with you. If your dress isn't totally screwed up in the front, or side, or wherever, you can be positioned in a way that doesn't show damage to the dress. And again, Photoshop is your friend here.

[Ohio888Bride]

Aww, thanks! :hug: I'm sorry this happened to you too... and I'm sure that it's exactly like what you've said. You know what you were supposed to look like, dagnabbit, and everyone else just sees a beautiful bride.

This does make me feel better about sending pics to friends and family.

What's really funny is that when I emailed my wedding pix to my former hairdresser (I stopped seeing her in January, because the drive was 2 hours each way - sigh), the first thing she said was, "where's all of her hair!". LOL! It's a long (sad) story LOL, but I'm driving to see her tomorrow, so that she can work her magic on my hair once again. She's an old friend, so it's worth the drive just to catch up and chat with her once or twice a month.

As Mitch said, think about the people who may have had a part in misplacing strands of your hair when they reached out to hug you. :) :innocent:

[amisteratwisterandme]

Rosie,

When I seen your pics, I seriously thought that you were one of the happiest brides I have ever seen, didn't notice anything wrong with your hair.

Love Mitch's opinion, too!

I would definately see about photoshopping your hair. If I can do it and I'm a novice, I bet the photog could surely do it!

[RosieAngel]

I just have to point out that, no, your photographer was not getting paid $500 an hour. The actual wedding day is the EASIEST part of a wedding. It's the preparation, the processing, and the cost that goes into running a business that you're paying for. Not the hours worked on a wedding day! Most photographers make less than $15-$20 an hour when it's all said and done.

Anyway, it stinks that you're not happy with your pictures. I am ALWAYS making sure everyone looks good in the formals, telling family members to take off their sunglasses, get that piece of lint, straighten the skirt, etc...so I am kind of surprised your photographer didn't point out your hair. Maybe she didn't think it looked that bad?

Can you ask her to see if it's fixable in Photoshop? She might be able to take your hair from your friend's photos and put it on the others. Also, if you haven't done so already, TELL HER. She may have something she can do about it, or she may offer to do an additional shoot with you. If your dress isn't totally screwed up in the front, or side, or wherever, you can be positioned in a way that doesn't show damage to the dress. And again, Photoshop is your friend here.

Eek, sorry for making that assumption! I should have known better, really.

You know, she was quite diligent about arranging my dress, having a groomsman's boyfriend watch over my glasses, adjusting where I was holding my bouquet, etc. Now that I think about it, she has crazy curly hair that sticks straight out, and she probably thought that mine looked cute.

I feel bad telling her, since the pictures are so skillfully shot and beautifully evocative that I really am pleased, except with myself. It really isn't her fault that I am a tomboy who never learned how to make myself pretty - or keep myself pretty after professionals worked their magic on me, apparently.

We might be able to do a reshoot. The rip in the front is really bad, but my MOH managed to tie a knot with the dragging ends of it behind the side-drape, and I'm pretty sure it won't be noticeable. As long as I keep the back bustled, the tear near the bustle point in the back shouldn't be a problem. It's worth a shot, but I'll have to use a different photographer, as I had a destination wedding and I think DH would file for divorce if I made him drive ten hours to her studio over a bad hair day! And then there's the expense of having my dress cleaned and steamed and getting my hair, makeup, and nails done again... :whyme:

I don't know. As more and more people assure me that I look fine, I'm thinking that I just overreacted.

[RosieAngel]

Rosie,

When I seen your pics, I seriously thought that you were one of the happiest brides I have ever seen, didn't notice anything wrong with your hair.

Love Mitch's opinion, too!

I would definately see about photoshopping your hair. If I can do it and I'm a novice, I bet the photog could surely do it!

Haha, thank you! I really was happy, and I didn't let wearing a ridiculous 10-pound dress get in the way of my having a good time! I don't even regret ruining the dress for posterity (after the initial shock wore off), because I had fun!

I'm debating asking her if she could shop my bangs in the ONE photo of us that I like the most. I think it would be stupid to ask her to fix all of them, but just one? Seems reasonable enough. I just hope she won't be offended.

[amisteratwisterandme]

Haha, thank you! I really was happy, and I didn't let wearing a ridiculous 10-pound dress get in the way of my having a good time! I don't even regret ruining the dress for posterity (after the initial shock wore off), because I had fun!

I'm debating asking her if she could shop my bangs in the ONE photo of us that I like the most. I think it would be stupid to ask her to fix all of them, but just one? Seems reasonable enough. I just hope she won't be offended.

I don't think she would mind, and if she does, it is kinda her job anyway right?

I am very serious about how happy you looked. I would not comment at all if I didn't like your pics.

[saltyveruca]

I'm debating asking her if she could shop my bangs in the ONE photo of us that I like the most. I think it would be stupid to ask her to fix all of them, but just one? Seems reasonable enough. I just hope she won't be offended.

That is totally reasonable. Make sure you tell her how much you love love love it...except for those darn bangs. :winktongue:

[Nekochanpurr]

I thought you looked beautiful!! :D Your hair didn't look messy to me..

I kind of know how you feel, though. All my curls had fallen out by the end of the ceremony, which means almost all of my pics i have straight hair still!

Don't let the little things get you down. You looked beautiful on your wedding day!

[KMS]

I honestly haven't looked at your pictures so I can't give you my POV about them. Ya wanna know why? Because I was (am) so unhappy with my pictures that I still don't enjoy looking at all of the OW brides pictures! So I totally know how you feel and I'm so sorry. It really is a sad feeling! I hope you can atleast get that one picture altered to where you like it better.

[RosieAngel]

Nekochanpurr - Thanks! I had no idea that your hair was supposed to be curly... :bbredface: Oops. It looks pretty to me, but I hope your hairdresser didn't charge you too much for it if you wanted curls!

Keely - REALLY?! Your pictures, at least, the ones you posted here, are some of my favorites. I remember looking at them and totally having wedding envy, which I don't have often! I am so sorry you don't like them!

DH is waiting for the CD to arrive in the mail to make an assessment of how bad I look. I imagine he will just tease me over how ridiculous I'm being.

[Nekochanpurr]

Hahah, i paid $55, plus tip...

[RosieAngel]

Same as me, UGH. $60 hairstyles must be cursed... :irked:

[Aleta]

Ok, I'm going to be honest here. After reading this thread, I went LOOKING, seriously looking for messed up hair and whatnots.

I have to be honest.

You looked beautiful, Rosie.

Your smile and adorable dimples and lovely dress ~ you made a beautiful bride, not just during the wedding ceremony but at the reception as well.

[KMS]

Awe, well thank you! With the more expensive packages at our venue, the photographer was able to spend more time with the brides and get better shots. I think that I just see that other bride in the same place as I was, but some of their pictures are more creative, etc so I always find myself comparing their pictures to mine.

[RosieAngel]

Awe, well thank you! With the more expensive packages at our venue, the photographer was able to spend more time with the brides and get better shots. I think that I just see that other bride in the same place as I was, but some of their pictures are more creative, etc so I always find myself comparing their pictures to mine.

Oh, so it's the photography style that didn't quite work for you! I thought you were implying that you and/or something at your venue looked bad in the photos, which just isn't true!

I'm sorry that your photographer wasn't the most creative, but I do like the selection you posted here!