WebLady
11-07-2008, 01:02 PM
Another article I found on onewed.com (http://www.onewed.com) I thought I'd share ...
Planning a wedding is stressful. Let’s not pretend. It’s a huge party for all the people you most want to make happy, and then in the middle of that you keep remembering that you’re committing the rest of your life to someone. It’s a big deal.
Knowing you’re dealing with a writhing, tulle-and-ribbon-covered ball of stress is half the battle. For the other half, here are a few pointers to keep your blood pressure numbers in the normal range.
Create a budget.
Yeah, the creating part can be a chore. (You can find tips on getting started over [[here.]]) But once you have it down on paper, it’s a friend, a shield, and a set of those little gates they put up in the bowling lanes to keep you from going into the gutter.
Your budget will keep you on the rails. It will give you the perfect reason to say no when you’re being pressured, and it will help you cut away what you don’t need. Grab your groom, make that budget, and feel a big block of tension melt away.
Plan early.
For a big foofy wedding (and that would be mine, thank you very much), you need to start planning at least a year in advance. That doesn’t mean you’ll poring over fabric swatches and cake toppers every single day. It just means that you’re buying yourself cushions of time. That’s why you should plan early even if you’re keeping it simple. Something that goes wrong when there’s only a week before the wedding is a nightmare. Something that goes wrong when you’ve got a couple of months to deal is a breeze.
Plus, early planning can save you money, which makes your budget happy. A head start will give you more choices for your venues and will allow you to shop around for deals and avoid the expense of rush deliveries. I may be going all-out, but that doesn’t mean I want to pay all-out for it.
Think about hiring a wedding planner.
A wedding planner plans your wedding for you. As you have deduced, that can really reduce your wedding planning stress. If you have the cash and you both have busy jobs, your wedding planner can be well worth it. You’ll still get to choose the details, it’s just that the nice man or lady you hired will be making all the phone calls.
Definitely have a wedding binder.
Yes, it seems silly and maybe even a little obsessive when you see someone else with one. Until you’re on the phone with the reception venue and you need the numbers of the caterer and the florist and what was the name of that color swatch for the chair backings? Put it all in one place and organize it with cute little tabs. An hour listening to music and setting up your binder saves you about 15,000 separate incidents that involve scrabbling around for contact information or trying to figure out which purse contains the napkin that you wrote that great idea on. Or was it a shoe store receipt that you shoved into your checkbook? For this one thing, go obsessive. You can go back to being charmingly scattered the minute you cut the cake.
Ask for help.
This can be a hard one, especially if you’re used to being Superwoman at work or the friend everyone else leans on at home. But you can do it. And your friends and family want to help you. Obviously you can’t ask someone to, oh, take care of the reception. But you can ask a friend or family member to take care of a few phone calls, or ask your maid of honor to schedule the fittings for your bridesmaids. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, let your loved ones know. They’ll either ask how they can lend a hand or let you know where they feel comfortable stepping in.
Schedule frivolity.
Give your self one full day where you don’t do one productive thing every now and then. Have occasional date nights with your fiancé with a strict no-wedding-talk rule. Hang out with the girls and get silly. If you have to, make a list of twenty things you love to do. Do at least one each week. Seriously – put them on your calendar. If you release the pressure every now and then, it won’t make the top of your head blow off.
See the humor.
Weddings are ridiculous. Beautiful and magical and I will be doing mine to the hilt, but I recognize in the back of my mind that the whole process ridiculous. Yes, I will be walking down the aisle looking like a princess. But if you squint just right, I will look like a decorative toilet paper cosy and I know that. I have spent an entire evening obsessing over which little pieces of plastic best represented me and my fiancé for the top of our cake. I have had deadly serious conversations about flowers and colors I have never heard of before, at least one leading to raised voices.
As stressful as it is, it’s also weird enough that I can see the silliness, and I know that in a year or two I’ll find it hilarious. Sometimes just stepping back and seeing that can help.
Take a breath and remember why you’re doing this.
You and your fiancé found each other and are thrilled enough about that to tell everyone you love. The wedding isn’t just the end of your planning, it’s the start of your marriage. When it’s for something that wonderful, it makes the planning come easier.
Good luck!
Discuss and share ways you have tried to beat the stress :cloppy:
For more great wedding related articles, check out The Scoop (http://www.onewed.com/wedding-articles/) :)
Planning a wedding is stressful. Let’s not pretend. It’s a huge party for all the people you most want to make happy, and then in the middle of that you keep remembering that you’re committing the rest of your life to someone. It’s a big deal.
Knowing you’re dealing with a writhing, tulle-and-ribbon-covered ball of stress is half the battle. For the other half, here are a few pointers to keep your blood pressure numbers in the normal range.
Create a budget.
Yeah, the creating part can be a chore. (You can find tips on getting started over [[here.]]) But once you have it down on paper, it’s a friend, a shield, and a set of those little gates they put up in the bowling lanes to keep you from going into the gutter.
Your budget will keep you on the rails. It will give you the perfect reason to say no when you’re being pressured, and it will help you cut away what you don’t need. Grab your groom, make that budget, and feel a big block of tension melt away.
Plan early.
For a big foofy wedding (and that would be mine, thank you very much), you need to start planning at least a year in advance. That doesn’t mean you’ll poring over fabric swatches and cake toppers every single day. It just means that you’re buying yourself cushions of time. That’s why you should plan early even if you’re keeping it simple. Something that goes wrong when there’s only a week before the wedding is a nightmare. Something that goes wrong when you’ve got a couple of months to deal is a breeze.
Plus, early planning can save you money, which makes your budget happy. A head start will give you more choices for your venues and will allow you to shop around for deals and avoid the expense of rush deliveries. I may be going all-out, but that doesn’t mean I want to pay all-out for it.
Think about hiring a wedding planner.
A wedding planner plans your wedding for you. As you have deduced, that can really reduce your wedding planning stress. If you have the cash and you both have busy jobs, your wedding planner can be well worth it. You’ll still get to choose the details, it’s just that the nice man or lady you hired will be making all the phone calls.
Definitely have a wedding binder.
Yes, it seems silly and maybe even a little obsessive when you see someone else with one. Until you’re on the phone with the reception venue and you need the numbers of the caterer and the florist and what was the name of that color swatch for the chair backings? Put it all in one place and organize it with cute little tabs. An hour listening to music and setting up your binder saves you about 15,000 separate incidents that involve scrabbling around for contact information or trying to figure out which purse contains the napkin that you wrote that great idea on. Or was it a shoe store receipt that you shoved into your checkbook? For this one thing, go obsessive. You can go back to being charmingly scattered the minute you cut the cake.
Ask for help.
This can be a hard one, especially if you’re used to being Superwoman at work or the friend everyone else leans on at home. But you can do it. And your friends and family want to help you. Obviously you can’t ask someone to, oh, take care of the reception. But you can ask a friend or family member to take care of a few phone calls, or ask your maid of honor to schedule the fittings for your bridesmaids. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, let your loved ones know. They’ll either ask how they can lend a hand or let you know where they feel comfortable stepping in.
Schedule frivolity.
Give your self one full day where you don’t do one productive thing every now and then. Have occasional date nights with your fiancé with a strict no-wedding-talk rule. Hang out with the girls and get silly. If you have to, make a list of twenty things you love to do. Do at least one each week. Seriously – put them on your calendar. If you release the pressure every now and then, it won’t make the top of your head blow off.
See the humor.
Weddings are ridiculous. Beautiful and magical and I will be doing mine to the hilt, but I recognize in the back of my mind that the whole process ridiculous. Yes, I will be walking down the aisle looking like a princess. But if you squint just right, I will look like a decorative toilet paper cosy and I know that. I have spent an entire evening obsessing over which little pieces of plastic best represented me and my fiancé for the top of our cake. I have had deadly serious conversations about flowers and colors I have never heard of before, at least one leading to raised voices.
As stressful as it is, it’s also weird enough that I can see the silliness, and I know that in a year or two I’ll find it hilarious. Sometimes just stepping back and seeing that can help.
Take a breath and remember why you’re doing this.
You and your fiancé found each other and are thrilled enough about that to tell everyone you love. The wedding isn’t just the end of your planning, it’s the start of your marriage. When it’s for something that wonderful, it makes the planning come easier.
Good luck!
Discuss and share ways you have tried to beat the stress :cloppy:
For more great wedding related articles, check out The Scoop (http://www.onewed.com/wedding-articles/) :)