rehearsal was a let down

[hummingbird521]

last night was our wedding rehearsal. Boy was it a let down. ;) I have been sick for three days now and my FH has been working a lot of overtime. So no one felt like rehearsing, and this was the only one we get. Upon arrival (with children in tow) since basically this was for them, the pastor only discussed the music and told what would happen during the ceremony itself. The woman from our church that is going to play the CD of music did not show up. The lady that is playing some of the music on the piano did. She practiced in the background. The pastor went over everything, but we did not actually get to let the children come down the aisle and practice the walks, or the lighting of the candles. they did not even get to stand and learn where to stand. Maybe this was my fault and i should have took the initiative with it, but i felt so bad at the time. Now i feel like we are going to have a very embarrassing wedding. The children are at a loss of what to do. All i know to do now is let them practice a lot at home. We will not be able to practice at the church as the pastor is going on vacation for two weeks. I guess we could possibly do this after church some sunday. But the date is May 21st and I still have so much to do that i don't know if we can find the time. My FH said he wanted it to be relaxed and he is getting his wish. I am just upset that instead of relaxed it will be a laughing stock. Completely and totally relaxed atmosphere for one and all. I do not want my wedding referred to as "oh that redneck wedding where no one knew what to do". I am just stressing here. maybe and hopefully we can get some practice time in.

[Jenn060306]

Perhaps you should call the pastor and let him know that you think you need to go over it again closer to the wedding date and be a little more assertive about what you need to know now that you'll be feeling better?

[hummingbird521]

that was our last chance to be able to do this rehearsal. the pastor is going out of town on vacation and will not return till the night before the wedding. around midnight sometime. possibly be able to do it without her though. at least if nothing else let the children practice their walk and show them where to stand and of course practice the giving out of the rings. just frustrating is all. my flower girl (who is my step daughter) has done this before, so she pretty well knows what she is doing. but on the other hand my daughter who is maid of honor (but 15 yrs old) has never done it, but i am sure she will be fine. it is the 6 year old step son i am most worried about. he is hyperactive anyway, but to put him in front of a crowd and he is even worse. he needs practice more than anyone. maybe we can stay after church this sunday and practice with them. i certainly hope so.

[CindySue]

Ive never heard of a rehearsal being this far away from the wedding, but I guess if its the only time, its the only time. You have a good idea about working on it after church. I know you are busy trying to finalize the wedding stuff, but it really wont take long, and the kids will be able to replay it in there minds exactly how the church looks and what to do so that can practice at home. You might want to do a "mock" rehearsal after church the Sunday before the wedding, if its going to be the only time you can get into the church.....at least for the kids.
And as far as nobody knowing what to do, Ive been told on numerous occassions that usually the bride in the ONLY one that notices that something didnt go right.
Good Luck!

[hummingbird521]

The rehearsal had to be scheduled this early since the pastor is going on vacation and leaving this weekend for two weeks. She will not be back till the night before the wedding. I spoke with her earlier and asked her about practicing some before the wedding itself whether she could be present or not. She agreed that we do need more rehearsal time and my FH has been given a key to church sanctuary. So a few nights before the wedding we are going to get in more practice time. Thankfully!!!!

[CindySue]

The rehearsal had to be scheduled this early since the pastor is going on vacation and leaving this weekend for two weeks. She will not be back till the night before the wedding. I spoke with her earlier and asked her about practicing some before the wedding itself whether she could be present or not. She agreed that we do need more rehearsal time and my FH has been given a key to church sanctuary. So a few nights before the wedding we are going to get in more practice time. Thankfully!!!!
Thats great! We are having ours the Thrusday before the wedding. We are kinda going to go over what everyone is going to do, but mainly its for our minister (this is his 1st ceremony) to be comfortable and know where to pause and so forth.

[Kacie_bride]

You could also show up early enough the day of the wedding to reinforce to the children what they are supposed to do. And like you said, practice after church and have them practice at home. I'm sure it'll be cute no matter what!

[WebLady]

Yeah I was gonna ask why you were doing the rehearsal so soon before the wedding, but I guess the minister being out of town is a good reason ;) However, IMO even if you got to practice the kids may not remember what they did a couple of weeks later (especially if they are younger)

If you can get into the church, you could always do a rehearsal without the minister. This is one of the reasons I highly recommend a wedding director for the rehearsal and the ceremony.

Hopefully it will all work out for you ... even if something goes wrong, not many people will know what it was suppose to look like anyway.

Good luck dear!

[usahgrad]

Maybe, if you're worried about spots to stand, you could have someone put some tape on the floor the day of. Nothing real big, just enough to give your kids an idea of what spot to go to if you don't get a chance to go over it beforehand. And your kids don't have to practice walking down the aisle they just have to practice walking. Set up a way for them to practice to the music at home and it won't be a problem come the day of the wedding. When my brother and sister-in-law got married, their ring bearer (my nephew) was so scared he was going to mess up, everywhere he went two weeks prior to the wedding, he walked like he was supposed to walk down the aisle! It was so cute how much he worked hard on it and he was only six. Kids know when something is important; I don't think you have too much to worry about and I'm sure no one will even notice.

For my father and mother's wedding the best man couldn't be at the rehearsal and he was Jewish. Well, my parent's wedding was a Catholic wedding and Catholics kneel down a lot at anything...Jews don't kneel and the best man didn't know he was supposed to. The day of the wedding, the maid of honor noticed he wasn't going to kneel down, so neither did she...no one ever knew!

Trust me, you're wedding will be beautiful and I bet everyone will be so stunned by how cute your kids are and how great they look all dressed up they're not going to notice if they stand in the right place or do the wrong thing. My nephew, halfway through the ceremony, stuck a GQ pose because he looked good and he knew it. Everyone laughs when they talk about that now because it was cute and it's a great memory! Good luck and I'm sure everything will go just fine!

[hummingbird521]

Thank you all for making me feel much better about it. Very good idea about the tape being placed on the floor. I hadn't thought of that. This site makes me feel so much better about things. And you're right, I will probably be the only one that notices if they mess up something. It made me remember my first wedding when my 3 year old brother was the ring bearer. We were married outside in a garden wedding and half way through the ceremony my little brother handed his pillow off to the maid of honor and announced for all to hear that "he was going to play in the rocks, this was boring". we all had a good laugh about it. And i guess we still do. Thanks again everyone.

[CindySue]

Thank you all for making me feel much better about it. Very good idea about the tape being placed on the floor. I hadn't thought of that. This site makes me feel so much better about things. And you're right, I will probably be the only one that notices if they mess up something. It made me remember my first wedding when my 3 year old brother was the ring bearer. We were married outside in a garden wedding and half way through the ceremony my little brother handed his pillow off to the maid of honor and announced for all to hear that "he was going to play in the rocks, this was boring". we all had a good laugh about it. And i guess we still do. Thanks again everyone.
Gosh that sounds like something my 5 year old will do. Or worse.....when it time for us to kiss, he will holler out "eeeewwwwww, thats so gross!"
Im not doing a walk through rehearsal with the kids. We may talk about what they are going to do but Im not going to stress over it. Our thing is this being our ministers 1st ceremony. I want to do this for him, so he can get the gist of how he wants to do it and make sure he knows where to pause, etc.