wedding shower???? not sure

[hummingbird521]

The ladies at our church want to give us a wedding shower. I am happy they are offering their help to us for anything that I might feel I need help with, but am unsure about a wedding shower. Reason being, this is my fourth wedding and my FH's second. We honestly do not need anything. We are getting rid of a lot of things now. But in all honesty we could use money. So how does one tell this to the ladies at church? Or we could use some nights of a babysitter in the future. Should we just let them throw us one and keep whatever we get? or should we say something to them about always using money instead? I don't want to offend anyone or make them feel that their offer and thoughts are not appreciated. anyone have any suggestions on this?

[Shawna Bride]

We had similar problems. Because my DH and I were living together for a few years before the wedding, we had mostly everything we needed/wanted. Unfortunately there's nothing you can say or do to persuade people to give you money. But, what you can do is ask your mother, sister, good friend to spread the word. It is not improper for them to say "I think they could really use the money instead of presents", but I think it is for you. Or you could just keep the presents, return them and use the credit to buy big things. We did that. We got ourselves a digital camera and a dining room table with all the things we returned.

[hummingbird521]

that would be a good idea. thanks. but their is no way my family can spread the news to the members of the church. they do not attend it. but it is a good idea to possibly return things and use the money to buy a big item or something we don't have maybe. we are planning on taking a vacation in october so we could possibly use something for this. thanks for the idea.

[WhiskeyGirl]

There is no polite way to ask for money!! Plain and simple. If it were me, I'd tell them thank you for the offer but it wouldn't be right for them to throw me a shower. Perhaps you could do a recipe exchange shower, where everyone brings their favorite recipe written down and that is their gift to you. Friends of ours did this, but I didn't attend so I dont know how well that went! lol

[hummingbird521]

you know this would be a very good idea of having a recipe shower instead of the usual type. i think i will run this idea past my FH and see what he says. he too has been trying to figure out a polite way of saying we don't really need anything. but that would be a good idea to do the recipe type. i had forgotten about that one. family had one thrown like that and she said it was a lot of fun and all the recipes came in handy. it would work for me as well, since i now have two soon to be step children. i could use some recipes for things like casseroles and quick fix one dish recipes. by the time i get in from work at night it is usually around 6 pm and don't have a lot of time to put together large meals. thanks for the wonderful idea.

[WhiskeyGirl]

No problem! Glad I could help! :)

[CindySue]

Perhaps you could do a recipe exchange shower, where everyone brings their favorite recipe written down and that is their gift to you. Friends of ours did this, but I didn't attend so I dont know how well that went! lol
This is a very good idea.......you could even have the guests bring a sample dish of their recipe.

[MOB Karen]

The ladies at our church want to give us a wedding shower. I am happy they are offering their help to us for anything that I might feel I need help with, but am unsure about a wedding shower. Reason being, this is my fourth wedding and my FH's second. We honestly do not need anything. We are getting rid of a lot of things now. But in all honesty we could use money. So how does one tell this to the ladies at church? Or we could use some nights of a babysitter in the future. Should we just let them throw us one and keep whatever we get? or should we say something to them about always using money instead? I don't want to offend anyone or make them feel that their offer and thoughts are not appreciated. anyone have any suggestions on this?

Amber also doesn't need all the household stuff that you get at typical bridal showers. She is going to do a honeymoon registry.

[CindySue]

Amber also doesn't need all the household stuff that you get at typical bridal showers. She is going to do a honeymoon registry.
Mine was a "Personal Shower". I got nighties and undies and bath & body stuff, etc.

[bnd94]

I am not going to have a shower. After 11 years of living together we really have everything we want/need.

Word of mouth is really the only way I can think to spread the word about wanting money. The honeymoon registry is a great idea too.

[Kacie_bride]

I think a themed type shower like the recipe shower would be nice. Perhaps instead of toasters and such they could bring the recipe and the sample and maybe cook books. A girl can never have to many cook books!

[hummingbird521]

at the wedding rehearsal last night the pastor brought up the wedding shower the ladies would like to give me. my FH and i explained to her that we love the thought but was unsure as how to tell them we honestly do not need anything. she asked if they could hold a shower and we could think of something. so we told her that their was one big item we could definetly use. over the weekend our vacum cleaner tore up. so we asked if possible if she could pass the word to them that this happened and if they would consider (since we have all kinds of things) a gift of money toward the purchase of a new vacum. she said that was a wonderful idea and she would definetly pass this along to them. so we are hoping we can get a new vacum as i am such a cleanliness freak. i had spoken to other members of my family as well as FH's and they all agreed this would be a good idea as well. so hopefully no one will take offense to this idea.

[bnd94]

I don't think anyone will take offense to that. It sounds like a great idea.

[Kacie_bride]

I wouldn't think anyone would be offended. It's really no different than them all getting together and buying you a vacumm that you registered for (if you had registered). This way you just pick it up yourself.

[Shawna Bride]

You can also do Bank registries, or Home registries.