PDA

View Full Version : I Feel Lost!!!

countrygirl
04-26-2006, 01:25 PM
Ok, I have to blab for a bit. I feel like that is all I do when I start a new thread here. But I am totally bummed out right now. My sister left for Utah last week, and I had totally grown acustomed to seeing her and the kids every day. Josh is off work all week, enjoying it. And I am at work. :(

I am starting to get anxious, and nervous about the wedding because I don't know what I am going to be able to afford. I am planning on doing alot on my own to save money. But don't even know where to begin w those things. J's mom apparently told him that she had $1000 she was giving us to use for whatever we needed it for. I talked to J last night, and he said that he hates asking her for money. I told him that I agree, I don't want to ask anyone for money, but if she offered it already, and we need it for the wedding, then I need to know if I am actually going to be able to buget it into our finances. My mom offered to give us $500 and pay for the cake, but she has since lost her job. I don't want to ask her for any now, and I don't know if I can afford the cake now.

My maid of honor started seeing a guy a month ago, and now they are 'pre' engaged. He hasn't asked her yet, but they are making plans. She is totally consumed by him right now, and doesn't have time to help me w anything. My dress is at her place, and I can't seem to even get a time to meet up w her to look at BM dresses.

I just feel like the planning is at a standstill, and I need help, but everyone has so much going on, and I wouldn't even know what to ask if I did ask for help!!!!
MOB Karen
04-26-2006, 01:53 PM
Ok, Heather, BREATHE! It's completely normal to get anxious about your wedding, but you still have time. So this is my suggestion... if your FMIL volunteered the money, I would consider it part of my budget. Call her on it if you have to, because you really need it! Our cake was $200 and it is pretty nice. Do you think you could afford that? As for your MOH, just talk to her and set some timeframes up. She is in the throes of passion right now and probably can't see the nose in front of her face. She probably just needs a push to get started. If all that fails, then me and Amber are right here in Phoenix and we would be happy to go look at BM dresses with you. We would love it actually. Good luck, sweetie!
countrygirl
04-26-2006, 01:56 PM
Ok, Heather, BREATHE! It's completely normal to get anxious about your wedding, but you still have time. So this is my suggestion... if your FMIL volunteered the money, I would consider it part of my budget. Call her on it if you have to, because you really need it! Our cake was $200 and it is pretty nice. Do you think you could afford that? As for your MOH, just talk to her and set some timeframes up. She is in the throes of passion right now and probably can't see the nose in front of her face. She probably just needs a push to get started. If all that fails, then me and Amber are right here in Phoenix and we would be happy to go look at BM dresses with you. We would love it actually. Good luck, sweetie!

You are so sweet Karen, thank you. You just really made me feel better. I just may take you up on getting together, that would be fun!!! We should do lunch or something!!!
MOB Karen
04-26-2006, 01:59 PM
You are so sweet Karen, thank you. You just really made me feel better. I just may take you up on getting together, that would be fun!!! We should do lunch or something!!!

Amber & I have talked about you before, Heather, and we would LOVE to get together with you and talk weddings! And we would LOVE to help you in any way that we can!
CindySue
04-26-2006, 02:22 PM
Heather, Ive gone through several of those moments. Kinda in one right now. One thing though as far as the DIY projects, sit down and make a list of everything you would like to do yourself. Then see how much time you have until the wedding and schedule 1 or 2 (maybe 3, if theyre simple) projects a MONTH. It will help keep you from getting overwhelmed. (This backfired on me because I rushed and had everything done and then ran out of stuff to work on)
I agree with Karen, if his mom offered the money, mention to her your working on your budget and was wondering if she was still able to help. It kinda leaves it open so that if she cant do the amount she original said, she can offer another amount. It can also go the other way, if she able to do more, then she can.
Now about your MoH........Id talk to her. She may not realized that shes not as focused here as she should be.
Good Luck!!
Amber818
04-26-2006, 02:38 PM
Ok, Heather, BREATHE! It's completely normal to get anxious about your wedding, but you still have time. So this is my suggestion... if your FMIL volunteered the money, I would consider it part of my budget. Call her on it if you have to, because you really need it! Our cake was $200 and it is pretty nice. Do you think you could afford that? As for your MOH, just talk to her and set some timeframes up. She is in the throes of passion right now and probably can't see the nose in front of her face. She probably just needs a push to get started. If all that fails, then me and Amber are right here in Phoenix and we would be happy to go look at BM dresses with you. We would love it actually. Good luck, sweetie!

Plus one a my good friends would love to come along and help you plan...you have three women here that would love to go look around with you, Heather!
Amber818
04-26-2006, 02:44 PM
Amber & I have talked about you before, Heather, and we would LOVE to get together with you and talk weddings! And we would LOVE to help you in any way that we can!

YES we would!!! :D
hummingbird521
04-26-2006, 03:02 PM
I agree here, just take a deep breath and slow down. It will come together for you. As my fiance told me "have patience honey". I bet if you let the MOH know you are getting frustrated and would like to get together with her she will find and make the time for you. As for the money involved on budgeting, I would plan on using it as well. If she offered then obviously she means it. Ask her about it, tell her some of your concerns and explain that you are getting budget together and would like to know if you can count of it. She will be honest with you and then those fears will be layed to rest as well. I don't know if i have been much help but know this:::: BREATHE SLWOLY AND EXHALE
countrygirl
04-26-2006, 04:20 PM
YES we would!!! :D

Thanks Ladies!!! You know, I think I will talk to my mom and see if she would like to get together for that!! She can have a mom to have fun with too!!
WebLady
04-26-2006, 05:49 PM
Well I don't know what else to say that the other ladies have said ... yes it is normal to have these feelings. Talk to your family and your MOH and I am sure it will all work out for you. If I was in Arizona, I'd help too ;)

Good luck hun :D
brewsells
04-27-2006, 08:55 AM
How are you feeling better about things, Heather? Sounds like these ladies are really helping you out.. (Sorry, I haven't been around for a few days)
countrygirl
04-27-2006, 10:42 AM
Thanks, they did acutally help a bit. It made me feel better. And who knows, maybe Karen, Amber, my mom and I really could get together for a 'ladies' lunch to swap ideas. That would be fun. My mom liked the idea too.

It really has been a blessing to be on here!!
MOB Karen
04-27-2006, 10:54 AM
Thanks, they did acutally help a bit. It made me feel better. And who knows, maybe Karen, Amber, my mom and I really could get together for a 'ladies' lunch to swap ideas. That would be fun. My mom liked the idea too.

It really has been a blessing to be on here!!

That would be fun, Heather! We will look forward to it.