Rehersal Dinner

[Jenn060306]

Ok, last summer Mark's mom offered to host the rehersal dinner at her house since it traditionally is put on by the grooms parents. They talked alot about it all summer and fall because it was a bit of an insentive for them to get their backyard all cleaned up. We simply wanted to have a BBQ and have everyone together because we thought it would be a nice way to relax for a bit before the Wedding Day. It's now coming up very soon and she hasn't mentioned anything about it since. We are a bit cautious about asking his mom if she is still planning on doing it because she might not remember saying it and be annoyed that we are now asking her too. I'm not sure how to go about brining it up. We have told her that we should be able to tell her what time the rehersal is at and on which date soon so she can make the arrangements to be there. But she doesen't say anything more about it or hosting the dinner.

Also.... is anyone sending invitations out for the rehersal? Information on when it will be and where then also letting them know that there is a dinner afterwards and where that will be.

[CindySue]

Ive never heard of sending inviations to the rehearsal dinner. These as usually just the bridal party, both sets of parents and the minister. I could be wrong but I thought this usually went by word of mouth.
As far as how to say something to her - I would just ask her......"We were trying to make arrangements for the rehearsal dinner and I know that at one time you had mentioned you wanted to host it. We dont want to burden you with it or anything, but we had got to thinking if this was something you really had your heart set on, we didnt want to hurt your feelings by scheduling something else." Doesnt look like youre pressuring her, it looks like youre trying to spare her feelings.
Hope this help. Good Luck!

[MOB Karen]

I agree with Cindy, I would just ask her to make sure. She might really want to do it, but hasn't gotten around to starting. She just might need some encouragement to get going on it. I definitely wouldn't give up on her without asking first.

As far as the invitations to the Reception Dinner, I don't think we are going to do that, we are just going to call them and let them know that the Rehearsal is such and such a date and time, and dinner will follow. I guess you could do invitations if you wanted, but I don't think it is required.

[WhiskeyGirl]

I agree exactly with what Cindy said! I've never heard of sending invites to the rehersal dinner either! I also heard that it is just word of mouth and for the bridal party, moms/dads/sisters/brothers of Bride and groom, grandparents and the officiant. (if they are there for the rehersal.)

[Kacie_bride]

I agree with the other ladies about the rehearsal. However, I have heard of invitations for the rehearsal. One of Justin's friends is getting married in two weeks and we received an invitation for the rehearsal. It was very simple, just printed off the computer on pretty paper. It worked out better than having to call everyone due to the fact we had a choice on what we wanted to eat. I am going to send out simple invitations when it comes time for my rehearsal. I am looking at about 40 people at mine. That is just the wedding party and their guests, Justin's parents, my parents, and our officiant and his wife.

[KMac]

Hi,
I agree with Cindy on this one too!
As for sending out invitations for the rehearsal, I have only heard by word of mouth. Ususally everyone directly involved with the wedding ceremony itself should be in attendance. Bride,Groom, Wedding Party, Parents, and if you are having specific people do readings at the ceremony, etc.
If there are alot of people to contact, maybe you could have 2 of your attendants begin calling people to let them know the arrangements for the rehearsal and have them do a phone chain. This might take some pressure off of you. Just a suggestion. Let us know how you do!

KMac :cool:

[Jenn060306]

Thanks Ladies,
Hopefully we won't step on her toes bya asking about it. I think i will send invitations. Nothing too extravigant, home-made. I did a little searching on the internet. It was recommended. I couldn't ask my attendants to call since most of everyone who will be attending live outside their area code. I might do an e-mail though. Keep it simple.

[CindySue]

I might do an e-mail though. Keep it simple.
Hey.....email is just as good as a phone call now days!!!!!
And when you ask her about the dinner, if you make it look like you are taking her feelings into account and putting them 1st, you shouldnt step on her toes! Good Luck!!!

[Shawna Bride]

We called everyone, and sent out "E-vites" (the greatest invention!) for anyone we had an email address for.
Written invitations are nice, but not necessary.

[Jenn060306]

Ah Ha!
I got an answer! My rehersal will be the Thursday before the wedding. But its going to be late 7pm we're going to start because the preist works for the highschool and won't be able to make it until later.
So when Mark told me this his mom was with us and she said she was planning to do somthing, but being so late it would be difficult. But we decided that we should be done by 830ish. So we could still do a coffee and treats gathering. We're going to get butter tarts and nanimo bars and fruit. It will be nice.

[WhiskeyGirl]

Ah Ha!
I got an answer! My rehersal will be the Thursday before the wedding. But its going to be late 7pm we're going to start because the preist works for the highschool and won't be able to make it until later.
So when Mark told me this his mom was with us and she said she was planning to do somthing, but being so late it would be difficult. But we decided that we should be done by 830ish. So we could still do a coffee and treats gathering. We're going to get butter tarts and nanimo bars and fruit. It will be nice.

Glad it worked out for you Jenn!!

[usahgrad]

That sounds so nice Jenn! We did the great big rehearsal dinner gala thing for my brother's first wedding and it was okay, but for his second wedding, we just hit a restaurant after the rehearsal, and that was SOOO much better!