Need Advice-Re Shower (a little long)

[KMac]

Hello Ladies,
Hope all is well. I could really use everyone's advice on this matter. I will keep this short. My brother and fiance are getting married this August. When the plans for the bridal shower were in the "works", the new in-laws came to a figure as to how much the shower meal would cost and then asked my mom if she could pay half. I totally disagree with this, because my mom is only inviting 22 people (for my brother's side) of the 100 invited. The new "in-laws" and my mom finally came to an agreement that my mom would only pay for the number of guests that she invited.

Now, here is where the problem is, the bridal shower invitations went out and we have been notified by family members that my mom's name is nowhere on the invitation as being a host or even a co-host of the shower. She is terribly upset,:bbcry: considering she has shelled out quite alot of money for favours, and gifts for games played. Not to mention, bend over backwards.

I just wanted to know how she should handle this? Does she let my brother and her future daughter in law know she is upset, or does she not say anything. Your advice and opinions are greatly appreciated.
Thanks in advance girls!

KMac

[Jenn060306]

I think telling her son that she is disapointed that she wasn't included in the invitations is fine. But i don't think making a big deal over it is really going to solve the problem. The invitations have done out. There is nothing anyone can do now. I think if she were to make a huge deal about it to her future daughter in laws parents it may cause hard feelings and annimosity between everyone.
I guess you have to consider.... is this really going to matter afterwards? Most likely none of the guests will even really remember who hosted what, but that an amazing party was put on for the bride and groom.
She might think twice about helping out next time, which i think is reasonable. But causeing differences between the parents will make things very difficult for your brother and his FW.
I'm sorry that your mom is hurt. Hopefully everything will work out for your family. Best Wishes!

[CindySue]

I agree with Jenn.
Hopefully this was just an oversight and not a preview of how things are going to be with the inlaws.

[KMac]

Hey Jenn & Cindy,
Thank you for your thoughts and advice on this. I do think this maybe a sign of how things are with this family. My FSIL's sister is the same girl that wanted to go out and buy my brother and my FSIL a $1200 BBQ, and was very upset that some of us didn't think this gift was a practical for them, even when they are not allowed to have BBQ's at the apartments that they reside at.
Where do I find chairs on this sight?........lol

Thanks again for the advice. You are all a great support system!

KMac :cool:

[WhiskeyGirl]

If this is the case then I don't think this should slide! Your brother should be informed on how badly his FW and his future inlaws hurt his OWN mother!! Its not fair for her to shell out the bucks and not get any recognition!! If it were me, I'd be calling my stinkin brother and informing him of this "Slight" (ok HUGE!!) oversight!! Do you think your mom deserves to have been treated this poorly?? Do you think she should have to be so hurt by this?? I don't!! If your mom doesn't call your brother, then I think maybe You should!!! JMO though, so take it for what its worth!! (but no one disrespects my mom and gets away with it!!!!!)

[CindySue]

I agree with you Shawna. I think Kmac should call him and inform him and NOT have mom do it. Because you know how it is. No matter how bad mom's feelings were hurt, as soon as she says something, she going to be labeled the ____________ MiL.