how to nicely kick a BM off?

[Jacobs_Girl]

Well its 1 month and something weeks until the wedding and one of my BM does not still have her dress. She had 4-5 months to get it and claims she wants to loose weight. Now she hasnt lost anything and still does not have a dress. I even told her to go onto ebay and get a dress my other BM's dress was $17.00

I really want to kick her out and add another one of my friends.

I don't want to hurt her feelings and since her and her mom will be at the wedding I don't want awkward situations. I've already had to tell her daughter she cant be in the wedding (she asked if she could be) because my nieces is the flower girls.

[mitch]

Such a shame She is mucking you about like that. Have you thought that maybe SHE doesn't want to be BM and is afraid to upset YOU. You never know until you talk to her.

I had an awkward situation with my "Friend and Her Mum" taking over My Wedding. I knew it would hurt them to say "Back Off" and that they are not even invited to the Wedding now. But to save my sanity i just had to tell them straight. That way they knew where i was coming from.

It did help a great deal to post it here and get a few feedbacks from the Ladies on OW. It helped me get my mind straight. Maybe after a few responses yourself you will be able to work through this minefield of frustration, anger and turmoil.

Good Luck.

[081608Bride]

Maybe you could set up a deadline. Like if you don't have your dress by 8/1/08 I am going to assume that you don't want to be apart of the wedding. I don't know if that will work or not. But it is an idea. Or tell her that since she hasn't gotten her dress yet you are assuming she doesn't want to be apart of the wedding. I don't know. For your sanity I say just talk to her about it. Otherwise her not having a dres sis going to drive you nuts!

[Jacobs_Girl]

Such a shame She is mucking you about like that. Have you thought that maybe SHE doesn't want to be BM and is afraid to upset YOU. You never know until you talk to her.

I had an awkward situation with my "Friend and Her Mum" taking over My Wedding. I knew it would hurt them to say "Back Off" and that they are not even invited to the Wedding now. But to save my sanity i just had to tell them straight. That way they knew where i was coming from.

It did help a great deal to post it here and get a few feedbacks from the Ladies on OW. It helped me get my mind straight. Maybe after a few responses yourself you will be able to work through this minefield of frustration, anger and turmoil.

Good Luck.

I would talk to her but she never answers her phone. We usually just text each other but now she isn't even texting me back until days later. Which kind of pisses me off.

I had problems with her and her dress before. I posted that she wanted to loose some weight and such but i KNEW she wasn't going to loose any. I know her!

thanks :grinhappy:

[mitch]

I would talk to her but she never answers her phone. We usually just text each other but now she isn't even texting me back until days later. Which kind of pisses me off.

I had problems with her and her dress before. I posted that she wanted to loose some weight and such but i KNEW she wasn't going to loose any. I know her!

thanks :grinhappy:

I really feel for you Hun. I know exactly what you're going through concerning Texts etc. Some People just don't think :bbeek:

I'd send her a text to tell her to either shape up or ship out.

[OctoberRedRoseBride]

Hi all! I just want to say I am having a similar concern. I have a bridesmaid who is wanting to lose more weight before she purchases her dress. I have decided not to stress about it. She is an adult and she recently got married so she knows how long it takes for the dresses to come in. So, I figure if she has her dress on the wedding day, wonderful! I will have my friend in the wedding. If she is unable to get her dress because she waited too long, then she can be an honorary bridesmaid and still my friend. I'm not worried about our sides being uneven or anything like that. I would much prefer to keep my friendship with her than lose her because of a dress. That is the question everyone should ask themselves. I know everyone wants their perfect wedding and I know I have more than enough stresses about every other part of the wedding, but when it all comes down to it, it is one day, and my friendships are important to me. She agreed to be a bridesmaid because she wanted to support us. My philosophy has been to be as laid back as possible and constantly remind myself what the day is all about, our love for each other! But those darn flowers better be perfect!!!! LOL!!! Take care everyone....and breathe! It will be allright and it will be beautiful.

[Tatum]

Hey girl sorry I know it can be frusterating. I honestly just want to say good luck I almost think that sometimes your wedding brings out your friendships. I too picked my moh and wish I hadnt picked her now but I can't be mean (or don't have the guts to say anything). I really wish you the best.

[Jacobs_Girl]

thanks everyone,

this BM is actually expendable. We were friends since grade school but I moved 900 miles away. Sometimes when I come into Rochester we go out to eat or something and hang out.

its not like she is my best friend and I see her daily. I am going to wait until I hear from my other friend to see if she can do it. If she can I will just call her and most likely leave her a voice mail message saying that since she doesn't have her dress I have to replace her.

I mean come on how hard is it to come up with $100? Not only that but EBAY is so great with dresses, you don't even have to spend over $20 for a BM dress off ebay. So that cant even be an excuse for her.

She actually thinks she just going to walk into Davids Bridal and pick out a dress and they will have it? Specially when she is super short and super round. If she cant afford it then she should come and tell me, my other Bm told me she couldnt and I bought her a dress off ebay.