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View Full Version : I quit, for real this time!


LaceyinPgh
04-08-2006, 07:21 AM
I believe that my wedding is 48 days away from this point. I would have to double check to be certain. Anyway, I ask you to refer to my previous post of "I quit" in this same section to get some background on the bs that has been going on around here. Now that you have done that, more has been piled on.

I do want to say that the thing going on with Sean at work might be working out somewhat in our favor. I can say that he and I were not only worried about ourselves in the last 2 years that this has been going on but of his 35 employees and their families. There was a short time when I thought we were going to have to file bankrupcy and close the firm down. But it looks like it might actually work out fairly enough and not "real" harm would be done. It isn't certain yet but it seems to be moving in that direction.

Also, for the last few weeks I have been terrififed for my cousin. She and I were raised like siblings when we were younger. (She is only 6 years older than I am.) Her doctor gave her a preliminary diagnosis od MS not too long ago. Well she went in for more tests and those results came in yesterday. She called me at work around 1 to tell me that her doctor just called, her results are in, and he needs to see her right away. So I have to sit in my classroom trying to teach lessons on US foreign policy and the U.N. while not having a nervous breakdown. Which I did quite poorly by the way. On my way home she calls to tell me that everything was negative her doctor just wanted to see the look on her face when he told her. (Note to self, the next time I see her doctor in an empty parking lot confuse the brake and gas pedals so that I can see the look on his face.)

I'm not to the I quit part by the way. Sean comes home from work and takes me to dinner at Eleven which is this fabulous resturant that we both like. We enjoy a great meal, lots of wine, and we finally start to get excited about our wedding again. We figure that our stress is over, God gave us a little pop quiz on what married life could be like, we passed, it's all goo.

I come home and call my mother around 9 to see if anyone else RSVP'd for the shower. I mention that a couple of my bridesmaids have volunteered to come down in a few weeks to help her bake cookies and pastries for the cookie table at the reception. She says that we can't make the cookies there (meaning her house). I tell her that we have to because the fact of the matter is I have one counter in my kitchen that is located in my inverted shoe box of a town house. She gets hysterical and says that we can't and she can't talk to me.(This would immediately alarm most people, but I have lived with and around my mother for 27 years - this kind of behavior is fairly routine.) So, I start to get ready for bed. About 10 minutes later she calls me back.

The night before last she and my step dad (they haven't been getting along) were lying on the couch watching a movie after dinner. He asked her if in the morning if she would follow him over to get new tires put on his car. While that was getting done they could do their weekly errands in town. No biggie, she says yes and asks him what time. He says he would like to get it done first thing in the morning so they don't waste the entire day. She gets up in the morning and he is no where to be found. The door bell starts to ring and there is a county officer knocking so of course she answers. He hands her divorce papers and walks away. The :censored: that she married went and secretly filed for divorce and never told her. He had done this weeks ago. When he was helping me unpack the teacups for favors for my shower he had laready done this and was going to hit her with it. When he went over the other day and "claimed" to have been fitted for a tux for the wedding, this was already in motion. This man is a complete nut job. He comes home from work, sits in the basement and smokes 5 packs a day. I know enough basic phsychology to notice severe bipolar disorder and depression. He has both in droves. My mother has a heart condition that could lead to congestive heart failure at any second and he pulls this :censored: . He couldn't be mature about it. He couldn't walk in and say, "We aren't getting along. I think we as adults just need to go our seperate ways." How do you live with someone and pull this?

My mother went to the bank and he had emptied and closed their joint account. She literally has $20 in her purse. He changed all the passwords on the computer so she can't even sign online. She had a credit card ($500 limit) for emergencies that she stashed away. He took it and maxed it out, then never told her and NEVER paid on it. So she found out yesterday that her credit is so shot she can't even get a cell phone in her name. (He by the way had hers shut off). And, he told her he wants her out of his house ASAP. My mother has never worked a day in her life. She is so sick that getting up and getting the paper off of the front porch can put her in bed for the rest of the day sometimes.

So now, 49 (I think) days before my wedding, I have to hire AND pay for a divorce attorney for my mother. By the way I am hunting for a good one. I figure if I am paying for it, I'm going to have making this *** ache's life a living hell for my enjoyment. I have to find my mother a place to live. She won't stay with me because she is terrified to live in the city. I have to find an attorney to work on getting her some social security benefits to pay for her rent, electric, food ect. I know that she won't get those if she just goes online and fills out hte forms. I will probably have to get her doctors in on this one too. I have to find a place for her to store all her stuff. She is flat broke so now I have to pay for my own bridal shower. (I told you all that was coming). And during all of this Ihave to slap on that happy face and finish up my wedding while pretending I give a ****.

I QUIT! I am moving to Fiji, taking up rum drinking as a hobby, and living in a shack on the beach. I think I am going to go with a tin and plywood shack because I don't think cardboard would hold up well during the rainy season. Is it wrong to need a drink at 821 in the morning?

Jenn060306
04-08-2006, 07:44 AM
Holy ****!
I'm sorry to hear that things have completely blown up on you! Not Fair! I really hope everything works out and that that :censored: gets what he deserves. He sounds like a complete prick and a sorry exuse for a man.
I really hope everthing goes smoothly for you trying to help you're mom out. You are a truely wonderful person, you really don't deserve to be crapped on so much. We're here for ya! :hug:

blueeyedbride
04-08-2006, 09:04 AM
Sorry to hear that all this is happening , if your are in you hometown and wanna meet for a drink Im litteraly (sp) only a phone call away girl...:hug:

CindySue
04-08-2006, 10:28 AM
**** Lacey, when it rains it pours, huh? I really do hope you stick it to your mothers 'soon-to-be-ex-husband' and I hope you stick it to him good! Now I have to admit I dont know your family and I dont know his reasons for leaving, but I can NOT stand someone who isnt man (or woman) enough to step up and tell what their plans are instead of sneaking around pretending everything is alright. (Similar happened to my dad remember?) Not only did he not give her warning, he pretty much left her unable to take care of herself. If you dont want to be with someone anymore, thats fine, but you DONT have to screw them over on your way to getting your freedom, and thats exactly what he did, isnt it?
Lacey, I hope everything works out for you and your mom. Your family is in my prayers.

WhiskeyGirl
04-08-2006, 12:41 PM
Lacey,

I am very sorry this is happening to you and your mom! I hope you nail his balls to the wall and take him for everything he is worth!! Can you have charges pressed against him for something??? I'd check with your local police or even with the divorce attorney that you hire and see if you can't!! He is a very lame and sorry excuse for a man!! Espicially this many days before your big day...what a prick! take care and I will keep you in my thoughts! I send you my best wishes!!

Shawna

andysgirl07
04-08-2006, 01:18 PM
Wow, Lacey that totally sucks. I am so sorry all this is happening to you. I hope you give that :censored: exactly what he deserves!! We're all here for you and if need be we'll bring out the chair! :chair:

LaceyinPgh
04-08-2006, 02:53 PM
Thanks girls. I have a couple attorneys in mind to call. They are all grade "a" 100% A-holes. That is what you want in something like this. Oh, and to prove that God is just out to jack me around, today driving from the cake tasting to the jeweler, a semi truck in front of us kicked up a rock that hit the windshield of Sean's new car. It left the biggest crack that I have ever seen, directly where I happened to be looking at the window at. Thankfully, insurace will cover it.

usahgrad
04-08-2006, 05:38 PM
While I'm not in the same circumstances, I know how you feel Lacey. I have had some pretty crappy things happen in life and it has taught me to look at things a different way as a survival tactic. Look at the positive side; obviously this guy is a creep, so your mother is WAY better off without him, even if he left her with nothing. At least she has a daughter who is totally willing and capable of helping to take care of her. What doesn't kill us just makes us stronger! Good luck with everything Lacey!

StaceyMc
04-08-2006, 10:07 PM
:censored: !

Don't you wonder how many tests you have to go through before all this **** will stop?

As for you mom moving out - if the place is in joint names, I wouldn't go anywhere until I talked to an attorney, if I could help it. If she's that ill, it doesn't seem quite fair that the jagoff gets to stay at the house!

If you can't find a suitable Grade A 100% A-Hole, let me know...I work in the legal field and used to do divorces, etc. I'll think about it this weekend and see if I can recall any of those A-Holes downtown that you're looking for - if I can't, I can run it by my boss to see if there are any ruthless divorce attorney's he can recommend.

It's kind of strange that they did personal service, usually certified mail, return receipt is the way most people go. Talk about a sh*tty way to do it.

Glad to hear that Sean's problem is kind of working itself out. At least that's one good thing.

Oh, and by the way, I'm going to put Eleven on my places to try list.

Take care girlie.

LaceyinPgh
04-09-2006, 08:01 AM
:censored: !

Don't you wonder how many tests you have to go through before all this **** will stop?

As for you mom moving out - if the place is in joint names, I wouldn't go anywhere until I talked to an attorney, if I could help it. If she's that ill, it doesn't seem quite fair that the jagoff gets to stay at the house!

If you can't find a suitable Grade A 100% A-Hole, let me know...I work in the legal field and used to do divorces, etc. I'll think about it this weekend and see if I can recall any of those A-Holes downtown that you're looking for - if I can't, I can run it by my boss to see if there are any ruthless divorce attorney's he can recommend.

It's kind of strange that they did personal service, usually certified mail, return receipt is the way most people go. Talk about a sh*tty way to do it.

Glad to hear that Sean's problem is kind of working itself out. At least that's one good thing.

Oh, and by the way, I'm going to put Eleven on my places to try list.

Take care girlie.

Thanks Stacey. Mom is in WV not PA. They hand deliver everything down there since it is such a small town. It isn't like there is much else for the police to do except hang out and wait til Saturday night to bust drunk teenagers. I already know who I think I am going to use. We are going in Tuesday morning to meet with her. I want a woman this time. I can't get mom anyone who is in downtown because I can't guarantee that I will be able to make EVERY little appointment and she won't drive in the area. She won't even drive in Robinson.

The place isn't in her name. Jackass mortgaged it so many times that even if he sold it he would still owe money. So, mom never allowed him to put her name on it. Jackass had major drug and drinking problems before they met. Then he went through an Ebay addiction not too long ago where he spent THOUSANDS of dollars a month. I don't know what the hell she was thinking when she married this one.

I'll keep everyone posted. On a lighter note this afternoon I thought that I had to go and sit at Sean's parents' house for his mother's birthday. That would have meant spending an afternoon watching his mother drink all day and his dad be a bigger Jackass than what my mom married. But now that my mommy needs me I get out of it. When God closes a door he at least manages to crack a window! Oh, and if you try Eleven go with the potato crusted scallops to start with. They are my favorite.

AngelinLove
04-09-2006, 10:13 AM
Good Luck Lacey...unfortunately divorces really bring out the absolute worst in people and just tears things apart. I mean my aunt and uncle divorced and he just really screwed her over...and he was he crazy one that just didn't want to be married anymore. He got the house, the new truck and everything in the house...plus before they filed for divorce he went and maxed out all of the credit cards. In the end she walked away from there like 18-year-relationship and 11-year-marriage, with an 8-year-old car and $40,000.00. She was physicallya nd emotionally unstable and he just went on living life as if nothing was wrong. I truly do wish you and your mother the best of lucka nd unlike my aunt...you need to make your mom fight..so that she doesn't get screwed any harder.

WebLady
04-09-2006, 02:04 PM
Wow! Well doesn't that just suck big time! I am so sorry you are having to go through all this Lacey. Maybe some good will come out of it. Keep your chin up girl, you don't have to move to Figi to drink rum ;) Just remember "it can't rain all the time" and "Everything happens for a reason" We still love ya ;) :hug:

Kacie_bride
04-09-2006, 08:11 PM
I'm sorry to hear this happened to you and your mother. It's a shame that people can treat people like they do. Good luck.

StaceyMc
04-10-2006, 07:38 AM
The place isn't in her name. Jackass mortgaged it so many times that even if he sold it he would still owe money. So, mom never allowed him to put her name on it.

Hey, that's a bright side, her name isn't on the house and mortgage(s). I forgot that your mom lives is WV.

Yummmm....scallops...I will put those on my list.