Future In-Laws

[Kacie_bride]

I only have had minor indescretions with Justin's parents. No big deal. They get on my nerves at times, but thus is life. My problem with his family is the extended family. This is not so bad because we only have to see them on rare occasions like holidays and days like today. Today was his grandmother's 70'th b-day. We all went over there. The last time I saw them was a few weeks before Christmas when we did Christmas over there. This was pre-engagement. He has an aunt that I know cannot stand me. She thinks I am satain's spawn because we live together and we are not married yet. The woman hardley speaks to me at all when I come around. At Christmas everybody gets a gift from the aunts but me. I know I am not blood, but the other significant others all get presents. I don't really care about that to much, but it sort of hurts my feelings. His mother and grandmother all get me something every year. However today really hurt my feelings.

Like I said, I have not seen any of them except Justin's mother since before the engagement. They all know about it too. Nobody even mentioned it or asked to see my ring. Nobody said congratulations or anything. One of his cousins just said I heard you guys are finally getting married, but that's all. Maybe it just slipped my mind, but everyone else I have been around that has not seen me since the engagement has grabbed my hind and begged to see the ring. They all ask a million questions. Everyone who hasn't talked to me in a couple weeks first ask how the wedding plans are coming. I feel like they don't want me in their family. I am a disgrace to them, a harlot, nothing. His dad's family is so great to me and his mom and one uncle on that side and grandma are great to me too. I just can't stand to be around those people!

[Jenn060306]

Aww i am sorry to hear that Justins family doesen't seem to be welcoming you into their family. I understand how you're feeling. Mark's extended family on his dad's side doesen't really care either. They're nice to be. But they've never really made any comments on the wedding. Well actually, just before Christmas when we were at his aunts house she said to me 'Oh i hear you and Mark are getting married.' This being 13 months after we got engaged. She had no clue when the wedding even was. I try not to worry about them. It's not really worth it to me. Like you, we don't see them a whole lot through out the year.
Have you talked to Justin about this? Told him how you feel? He may be able to say somthing to his family about it. Tell them that you are staying, and will be apart of the family so they shouldn't treat you any differently then any of the other spouses. It really isn't nice to be not included in gifts especailly at Christmas.
Hope you are able to work this all out. You are a really wonderful person and his family is really mising out by not getting to know you better.

[Kacie_bride]

Thanks Jenn. Justin knows about it. He doesn't really like the particular aunt I am talking about anyway. He doesn't even like going over there. I didn't say anything about nobody even mentioning the engagement to him. I'm sure he didn't notice that. It's not really worth confronting them. I just feel bad about it and needed to vent some.

[CindySue]

Brian has family like that too, but they are extended family members and we only have to deal with them at his grandparents house on Christmas day. How much do you have to deal with this Aunt?

[Kacie_bride]

Not much. It's not a big deal. I was just upset about it yesterday and I hate to go over there.

[brewsells]

I know how you are feeling, Kacie. I have future in laws that are the same way. I used to let them get to me, but have finally said screw it. Besides, it their loss, not yours.

[LaceyinPgh]

At least you get along with the majority of them. That is better than some. Just ignore the old bat. Apparently she only read the X rated fornication parts of the Bible and skipped out on those not judging others parts.

[CindySue]

Not much. It's not a big deal. I was just upset about it yesterday and I hate to go over there.
I kinda feel the same way, Im sorta kinda dreading Christmas, but this year I will be his wife and so none of it will matter. This past Christmas I was treated like Brians "woman of the week" but he does not go through women like that. Before me, his relationships were for 4 years, 9 years, and 2 1/2 years.

[Kacie_bride]

At least you get along with the majority of them. That is better than some. Just ignore the old bat. Apparently she only read the X rated fornication parts of the Bible and skipped out on those not judging others parts.

You're right. When I moved in with Justin I had just lost a roommate and could not afford to pay rent on my own. I had to move in with him or I would have had to quite school because I couldn't have afforded it. That is the reason I moved in with him before we were married anyway. My mom doesn't approve, but she is over it and loves us both.