OK - I am on the other side now

[SerendipityCrafts]

Today, DH received a wedding invite in the mail from his coworker/supervisor. It's addressed to him only - so how would you take it - does it mean that I am not invited?

Or does this mean she doesn't know my name? :rofl:

[bichonlvr]

Oh snap!! Hey at least it was not addressed to him and another chick!?!?!?!?

[sweetvenus]

I got an invitation from an old friend of mine about a month ago that was just addressed to me. I was a little confused as well, because she knows I'm engaged and she can easily figure out FH's name through Facebook. I ended up emailing her and asking, and she said everyone had been asking her the same thing and she had just thought it would be easier to address it to one person and that of course he was invited, lol.

So...it could just be laziness.

[SerendipityCrafts]

I seriously wonder if it was intentional or could it be just an oversight???? I have met her before and I have gone out with the "gang" for happy hour drinks on occasion but .....

perhaps she's taking a cue from the company Christmas party; no spouses allowed. Perhaps she wants to have a table filled with company coworkers? :ooh:

and this makes me wonder ... does DH bring a gift valued at half the amount that he might have brought if I was invited? LOL

[neebelung]

Just means they didn't know your name. LOL....

I felt bad that the other day, when we got the save the date from my little cousin, it was addressed to me "and guest." :bbeek: FH and I have been together for 4 years.... and yet she apparently didn't know his name!!!

[SerendipityCrafts]

I ended up emailing her and asking, and she said everyone had been asking her the same thing

I would hate to have DH ask her if it was intentional - lol nothing like putting her on the spot (in that she is his supervisor and not his "friend"). Maybe if he just RSVP's for himself, she will ask him why I am not available LOL

[sweetvenus]

I would hate to have DH ask her if it was intentional - lol nothing like putting her on the spot (in that she is his supervisor and not his "friend"). Maybe if he just RSVP's for himself, she will ask him why I am not available LOL

Yeah, I went back and forth for like a week before I finally broke down and asked her. I apologized and said that I understood if he wasn't because of room or budget restraints, I just wanted to double check.

[SerendipityCrafts]

Oh snap!! Hey at least it was not addressed to him and another chick!?!?!?!?

Not possible. I am the ONLY one for him LOL

[FFC]

I'd have your DH ask the groom.... guys are more apt to be honest about it. Just a thought!

[SerendipityCrafts]

I'd have your DH ask the groom.... guys are more apt to be honest about it. Just a thought!

Neither of us have ever met the groom :) and I am guessing that the invite came to the house because she doesn't want to invite the whole company.

Would it be cheeky of DH to ask his supervisor using sweetvenus's approach - ie I understand if there isn't the room or if there are budget constraints. I just wanted to double check.

It doesn't really matter to me if I go or not.

[FFC]

Oh I gotchya... that's a good approach too :happy:

[MrsDM]

What about just asking her if spouses are invited? I don't see anything wrong with it.

I'm sure that he isn't the only one who got an invite like that. It may be good to know and he can pass the word around to others who are wondering.

[bichonlvr]

Yeah he should for sure say....kinda jokingly like hey is this going to be a big work group party...or are people bringing their spouses???

Or have him suggest OW to her and she can post a ? HA HA HA HA!!!

[WebLady]

I would assume it was an oversight; because it is sort of rude not to invite spouses. But it wouldn't hurt to have DH ask.

Did the invite come with a formal RSVP ... ____ will be attending? You could just RSVP with 2 in that case.

If you don't care then I wouldn't worry about it; Hugh could go without you or just send a gift.

[Danielle9608]

Could DH ask another coworker that he knows is invited if their spouse was invited?

[SerendipityCrafts]

Could DH ask another coworker that he knows is invited if their spouse was invited?

hahahah he JUST JUST suggested doing that. He says "that is exactly what this dh is going to do!"

[SerendipityCrafts]

Did the invite come with a formal RSVP ... ____ will be attending? You could just RSVP with 2 in that case.

Yes it did but the outer envelope was addressed to him only ... which started this whole thread LOL

Just not sure we want to assume that two are invited if the invite is addressed to only one.

[aspasia475]

Yes it did but the outer envelope was addressed to him only ... which started this whole thread LOL

Just not sure we want to assume that two are invited if the invite is addressed to only one.

Was there an inner envelope (or fill-in lines on the invitation?) Traditional non-U.S. etiquette is that the outer envelope is addressed to only one person -- usually the lady of the house since she is usually the social convener for the whole household. The inner envelope or invitation itself would then bear the names of everyone who was invited.

[bichonlvr]

So did he ask at work today????

Maybe the bride like him :)! HA HA!!!! I am totally kidding!

[SerendipityCrafts]

So did he ask at work today????

Maybe the bride like him :)! HA HA!!!! I am totally kidding!

LOL he had "one of those days" yesterday and so he didn't get around to asking someone else. I suppose that is going to be tricky .... in that his invite was mailed to our house, we would assume that any other invites were also sent to the coworker's houses. So, now he has to find someone who he THINKS might have also been invited :rofl:

The inner envelope was blank but the response card was the fill in the blank type -
__________ people will be attending.

[Danielle9608]

LOL he had "one of those days" yesterday and so he didn't get around to asking someone else. I suppose that is going to be tricky .... in that his invite was mailed to our house, we would assume that any other invites were also sent to the coworker's houses. So, now he has to find someone who he THINKS might have also been invited :rofl:

The inner envelope was blank but the response card was the fill in the blank type -
__________ people will be attending.

Humm.. that is a tricky one. Cause if he mentions it to someone that wasn't invited it becomes even more of a pickle.

[Cilantro]

Update?? :)

[Jacobs_Girl]

I am sure it was an oversight, I did that on my invites as well some people I knew were married I put Mr. & Mrs. others I sometimes worte John Doe & Guest if I knew they had a SO or I just put one persons name because I wasnt sure.

I am sure she has a lot on her mind with the wedding and all. She just probably forgot. Good luck

[RosieAngel]

I had the same problem recently... My cousin invited Dad to the wedding, but she forgot to put my name on it or send me an invite, so I didn't come. She then asked Dad why I wasn't there! :bbeek:

Good luck! This is a tricky situation.

[10Nov2008]

It's probably an oversight...or ignorance on how things should be addressed. I know that when my fiance gave me his list of names to invite to the wedding there were a lot of "Bob and _________ Smith." I'm still missing half of the spouses names for the people he works with. Everything I'm addressing is to "Mr. and Mrs." and I'm praying he didn't skip over anyone that is married that he might not have remembered and similarly, I'm hoping that we caught all the recently divorced people and weeded out the exes!! Thank God I don't have inner envelopes and I'm praying I have everyones (correctly spelled) names by the time I do the place cards!!

Have him talk to the host and see if it was an oversight or for some reason the couple has chosen to only invite the co-worker and not spouses.