Not excited?

[LaceyinPgh]

Ok, so Sean came home from the looming brunch with mommy and daddy. His sisters were there, of course. Anyway his sister, Kelly made the annoucement that she and her husband were expecting. This is great because it will be the first baby in the family. So Sean comes home and all he says is, "I hope those bridesmaids dresses can be altered for a Brittney Bump." I looked at him like he was crazy because I have no idea what the hell he is talking about. So he takes note of the look of confusion (or delierium from inhaling the fumes because I was working on the wax seals - either way.) and tells me that Kelly is pregnant and due in November. That was it, no excitment, no joy, no I'm goig to be an uncle. Just, "I hope the dresses can be altered." Then I realized that I wasn't very excited either. He has been home for hours and hasn't mentioned a thing yet. Hell, my mother was more excited when I mentioned it to her on the phone a coupel hours ago.

Now I feel so bad. This is such a happy time in Kelly and Mike's life. I really do like and care about Kelly and Mike. They are good people. But, I just don't care that she is pregnant. At first I thought that I was jealous. Then I realized that I am not. I don' want a baby at this stage in my life. I don't really even like kids at this stage in my life. I went from not excited to mad because I am going to hear people ohhing and ahhing over the baby at my bridal shower and wedding. (They were upset that I was engaged at Kelly's wedding in April.) That was a lapsing bridezilla moment. The woman is going to 40 in a couple of years, she really couldn't afford to wait a minute longer to pregnant with her first kid.

I just feel awful because I am not at all excited. In fact if you put this on a scale of "How much do you really care," it would rate mighty low. Sean seems to have the same opinion. Although I can't say for sure because I haven't asked him about. But, since he didn't even say that he was going to be an unlce I don't think it is rating very high on his care chart either. What is wrong with us? I feel like we are bad people.

[Kacie_bride]

You are not bad people. I've noticed since I've been engaged (which has only been since December) that you get a case of the "me" syndrome. All of your life things have not centered on you for months at a time. You've been thinking of other people and been helping with their events. Now for the first time it's you, you, you. You just don't want someone to share the "fame" with for the time being. I'm not saying it's right, but it's human nature. You just have to at least pretend for their sakes that you are happy for them. And I think you will eventually truely be happy for them. As a bride you are under a lot of stress and you feel all sorts of different emotions all the time. We all just have to learn to think of other people and of their hopes, dreams, and accomplishments. I gather from reading your posts that you are a good person and I you shouldn't feel bad. You'll be happy for them eventually. It'll just take some time.

[WebLady]

I don't think I would worry about it too much ... you are not bad people for not jumping for joy ;)

I wasn't really that excited when my sister told me she was pregnant. I love me niece and while my sister was pregnant I helped her where I could and I helped with the baby shower and I got her a nice gift. But, I never ooohed and awwwed ... I still don't and the baby is nearly 2. Yeah I love her and I like spending time with her and my sister but I like going home to the peace and quiet of my house ;)

One of my best friends just found out she was pregnant this past Thanksgiving ... when she told me I knew she was happy and that they had been trying for a while so I said congrats but that is about it. She talks about being pregnant and what she is going to name the baby and how she is going to decorate and such and I listen but I could really care less. (I am so bad :redface:) I mean, I am happy for her but I am just not one to be all googly over a baby. That doesn't make me or you a bad person.

Besides, you have alot going on in your life right now too. Be happy for your FSIL and maybe send them a card or something but don't sweat it. They should know you are not the 'baby type' right now.

Best wishes :D

[Kacie_bride]

You know I've noticed a lot of people aren't all that into babies. One of my bridesmaids is also pregnant, but she is due in August and we are getting married in December. To tell you the truth if she was going to be pregnant at my weddding I wouldn't have liked it very much either.

[Jenn060306]

I don't get all crazy and baby happy when people i know are pregnant. I could have sworn there was somthing in the water at the office i worked at last year. There was 4 babies born in that year. When ever the staff came to visit with their babies all the woman freaked and were all oooooh baby! I even heard one girl who was also a student say her 'ovaries where jumping' :bbeek: I love my nieces and nephues but i was never really exsited when my SiL was pregnant and i am not jumping up and down now that she is trying to get pregnant again before their last one turns 1 in October.

All you can do is congratulate them and be there for her if she needs you. But don't feel like you guys are bad people because you arn't bouncing off the walls with exsitment.

[bnd94]

I thought there was something in the water at my last job too. 3 people there had babies within months of eachother. It depends on who is pregnant I guess, for me anyway. When my cousin was pregnant I wasn't excited at all but we are not very close. But when my best friend got pregnant it was a whole different story. I think sometimes I was more excited than she was. LOL! :bblol:

Your not a bad person Lacey for not getting excited. Like the other ladies said you have alot going on in your life right now. :D

[WhiskeyGirl]

You are so not a bad person for not being excited Lacey! I know I am never excited when I hear someone else is pregnant but my reasons are a little different!! Sometimes its hard to really care, I know!! I think its mostly to do with where you are in your life right now! Maybe, if you were at the same stage it might excite you more, right? But right now, you are planning your wedding and that is your first priority!! Don't worry about it! You are not bad people, believe me, we all know that!! lol. I'm sure the excitement might rise a little with time!!

[LaceyinPgh]

I talked to my mom and she did point out that Kelly and I aren't that close so there isn't really a big reason to be excited. As long as I am happy for her (which I am) it doesn't matter. My mother also pointed out that I have a reprieve from fmil for like the next 2-3 years. She is going to be ignoring the wedding and the holidays this year because Kelly is pregnant or will have had a brand new baby. The new baby is going to keep her tied up until at least next May which will be our 1 year anniversary. By that time, I'm sure Kelly (with her age factor) will be trying for or already ahve concieved another one which will easily buy me another year of peace and quiet! After that though the gates of hell from fmil will have opened and I will be getting the baby lectures from her. No thank you. No babies until at LEAST 30 or possibly a little later. Sean and I agree on that one.

[rainbowtreat]

I guess it in logn run it is a good thing for you then.

As I love babies I don't get all excited for some one I don't know or care for much. At work ( a bank ) we see alot of kids but we all go crazy over the animals. I took my cats in on the way to the vet last Friday and every one loved them and had to talk to them and pet them. My son doesn't ever say much when he is there with me but he had no problem letting every one know which cat was his.

You not aloen Lacey and it doesn't make you a bad person. Enjoy the peace and quiet from your MIL.

[officiant-fica]

Don't feel bad. You mom sounds like she knows what she's talking about. You a not in anyway a bad person. I have one child, and I still do not ooh and ahh over babies. It's just never been my thing.