Sisters::ugh::

[Scrwballsgrl]

Okay the heading of this topic probably sounds a littel more critical than the actual situation but here it is....
my sister(twin sister might i add) is getting married in November of 2008 the weekend after Thanksgiving, reason being that anyone from out of town traveling in for Thanksgiving wont have to make a seperate trip b4 or after for her wedding...here's the problem: She hasnt started plannign anything yet!!! Okay exaggeration, her and her FH have picked a venue for the wedding/reception, she's chosen her colors but thats as far as it goes! the deal is I''m anxious for her to start planning her wedding b/c I want to be involved in helping her and all the fun stuff that goes along with it but she just isnt gettin started..Add to the situation that my fiance and I are planning a wedding for May of 2009 and we already know our venue, what type of food were serving (though we havent made any deposits yet) centerpieces, flowers, favors, etc. Its just frustrating b/c I'd like to start really accummulating the things I need/want for my weddingn but dont want to over shadow or upstage my sister in this b/c she jsut wont get the lead out:( i know this probably sounds so petty but.....IM READY TO START PLANNING!:bblol:

[WebLady]

Maybe ask your sister about her wedding, what she wants and if she would like some help. Maybe that will get her started.

[Danielle9608]

Do you think she might be having money problems and that is why she is putting it off?

[Nekochanpurr]

LOL my twin sister and i had a problem like this.. Only she planned everything without really telling me anything. D= So it was hard to help her or get into it.. But it was disorganized! The only thing i can tell you is.. Well.. Make sure she knows where everything should go! In my sissy's case, it was before i found this website (i wasn't engaged at the time), she she didn't have a clue how anything worked. Maybe lead her over here? If you don't want to do that, i'd just try hinting 'hey, lets go look at this..' heh.
Oh, and just being nosey.. Are you identical or fraternal?? We are identical! :D

[Scrwballsgrl]

i dont know what the deal is.lol I asked her a few times b4 if she'd like to go to different places and "look" not buy b/c I know she's waiting on a tax return to really get started...but she doesnt even act interested in looking to get ideas!? when i mentioned it to her she said well i dont want to buy things so far in advanced!!!:bbrolleyes: I'm like 'So far in advanced?" She's only got 9mths, I mean I know its possible to plan a wedding in far less time than that but dont most places like you to reserve things a few mths ahead of time? Not to mention with it being around the holidays people may be having co. functions and other things for Christmas & thanksgiving, possibly limiting caterers an such? maybe Im jsut worrying to much and shoudl jsut let her let me know when she wants to get started....I jsut dont want her to wait to long and then be in hysterics b/c everyones already booked, sold out, etc. adn then start panicing....(whch is kinda how she does things)

[Scrwballsgrl]

Neko:bbsurprised: hi nice to meet another twin
we're fraternal...you can tell we're sisters but would never guess we're twins.
did ya'll ever pretend to be the other one?

[todaysdestinationwedding]

I agree with weblady here...ask her if she wants help. My FDIL and her sister are getting married about 8 months apart and they just made a sister day of it at a bridal shop. Ask her if she wants to go try on dresses...but don't let her lack of planning put a damper on your own planning. This could be a great time for sister bonding....finding things that you want the same and different.

[Nekochanpurr]

Neko:bbsurprised: hi nice to meet another twin
we're fraternal...you can tell we're sisters but would never guess we're twins.
did ya'll ever pretend to be the other one?

Unfortunately, we couldn't. We are whats called 'mirror twins', which means i'm left handed, my sis is right handed.. Mom was a tattle tail and would tell all of our teachers before hand! :bblol:
Remember, we'll be happy to help you plan your wedding, too!! *^^* Don't feel you should have to push things back.. You can always get little things done while you sis is shuffling her feet!!
Ohh.. You should tell her to join the site, we will show her the light! LOL. Most of the time its actually cheaper to book things earlier..

[Scrwballsgrl]

oh thats cool being a mirror twin
yea i guess i'll just start doing my stuff little by little, I'll try to encourage her to get on the OW site...she's usually all about the computer so maybe it wont be too hard:)
I tried talkign to her about that too...places prefering you reserve things ahead of time but I dont think its sunk in yet...well thanks for the suggestions everybody:D

[Nekochanpurr]

No prob!! hope to see you in other parts of the board! *^^*

[WBandMe]

Not to be a downer, but are you sure she wants to be married? Maybe she's dragging her heels so much because she's not sure she is ready to do it. I could be way off, just a suggestion to consider though.

[EarlyBird]

some people just are not into it. i dont understand it either. my cousins wedding is JULY OF 2008 and i was talking to my aunt and she said "we have the venue, thast it" she doesnt have a dress, colors, centerpieces, photog. etc etc !!!! it drives me nuts, esp since when she decided on red and my aunt said "thats van's color" she was like "well her wedding is after, i should get first pick" NOPPPE thats not happening, you just stick with another color, you procrastinator

[Measha]

My wedding is around the exact same time as your sisters, wow! I must confess I don't have as much done as I would like. But I have my colors, my dress picked out (not ordered), in fact all the wedding party clothes are picked out pretty much. Also an overall theme and I know what I'll be DIYing and how, etc. The one BIG thing for us is venue because of $$ and just oog. It's been so hard to get one even though I KNOW I wanted to book one a year in advance...didn't happen.

So is she dragging her feet or maybe she's a bit overwhelmed? Also a consideration is that perhaps she was wanting or waiting for her FH to get on the ball with it too? It might sound like a lame "excuse" but I know I took my time with some things trying to get an opinion out of him. Which, now be honest ladies, isn't always easy!

Anyhow, yes definitely get her to join us here :) There is a lot of advice, help, and open ears!

[Scrwballsgrl]

some people just are not into it. i dont understand it either. my cousins wedding is JULY OF 2008 and i was talking to my aunt and she said "we have the venue, thast it" she doesnt have a dress, colors, centerpieces, photog. etc etc !!!! it drives me nuts, esp since when she decided on red and my aunt said "thats van's color" she was like "well her wedding is after, i should get first pick" NOPPPE thats not happening, you just stick with another color, you procrastinator

i know this is really gonna sound selfish but I had really picked my venue even b4 FH and i got engaged bc I'd seen the place b4 in a magazine adn just fell in love with the idea of whenever,whoever my wedding was I wanted to have it there....so she shuffled her feet and was like "well cant we use that same place that Emmas using..." At first I was like well I guess but the more I thought about it I didnt want at our wedding for everyone to say"oh yeah I remember ths place where Frances & aaron got married!" Um no!?
God it sounds so petty:bbredface:

[EarlyBird]

to me, its the same feelings -- i come from a family with 10 girl cousins that are all within like 5 years age of each other. Its a little crazy esp. since we are all bridesmaids in each others weddings and its kind of like they are all within the same yr (08) so... i dont think it sounds petty cuz i decided to have my wedding in 09 just so it was MINE... everyone asked why so far away and in my heads its cuz there was nobody else engaged and i knew that i would have 09 all to myself :) hahahahah

[Scrwballsgrl]

Thank goodness! cuz when I told my mom she started poking fun saying my Gosh your aunt and I got married in the same church only a few mths apart! I said well yes if I'd chosen to get married in our church then that would be different but b/c I picked a special place (not that church isnt special but you knwo what I mean) I would feel liek it took away a little of the surprise at how "MY" venue looked all dressed up for a wedding after someone else (close) had gotten married there jstu a few mths prior....but another reason was when I mentioned it to FH he got upset and was like well i dont want their weddign overshadowing ours (maybe thats to strong a word but I didnt know what other word to use??) by it being at the same place....adn now my sis FH decided he wants a Bananaa pudding for his grooms cake when we've only all been talkign about how funny it is that my FH said from the get go that ws what he wanted...I'm jsut not gonna mention it to FH lol jsut to save aggravation

[Nekochanpurr]

Lol, just don't let her know stuff like that anymore.. It sounds like shes a bit confused as to what to do and is just going to use whatever you do. Its okay not to want the same things! I wouldn't want to be married the same place as my sis, either... you want to have SOME of your own identity. I would ask her if she'd like to go looking at places for receptions and stuff. She might find it fun once she knows what shes doing. *^^*

[Scrwballsgrl]

Lol, just don't let her know stuff like that anymore.. It sounds like shes a bit confused as to what to do and is just going to use whatever you do. Its okay not to want the same things! I wouldn't want to be married the same place as my sis, either... you want to have SOME of your own identity. I would ask her if she'd like to go looking at places for receptions and stuff. She might find it fun once she knows what shes doing. *^^*

well she has picked a venue now a botanical gardens down here thats really pretty and has inside and outside areas in case its cooler in November(last year was a scorcher and this year ws kinda cooler)
well our older sis actually joked when we both 1st go engaged that we should do a wedding break for lunch then do another; and she (my twin) said no absolutely not we've shared everything since the womb I dont want to share my wedding day too...I think I'm creating chaos where there isnt any but it just gets frustrating:)lol

[Nekochanpurr]

LOL, your okay. My sis was doing that, too. 'No, you can't have Aug, thats MY month!' It was kind of funny. =D But it'll all work out!