Bridal Shower and MOH

[HisMuse]

So initially there was some confusion about who handles the bridal shower but then I found out for certain it is usually done by MOH. I'm curious how this usually works. Does she pay for it herself entirely? Do BMs usually help? I'm sure my mom will help.

[bichonlvr]

I think it depends!!

I am having! 2 MOH's and they paid for the entire thing!!!

When I was a MOH I paid for the entire thing, and I did the Bach. party too!!!

[HisMuse]

It seems like a lot of money. She had initially believed it was the bride's mother who does the bridal shower because her mom did hers and her sister's. I guess I'll let her and my mother figure it out. I've never been a MOH (probably never will be) so I'm new to all that.

[RevMatty]

I've seen it done by the MOH, parents of the bride, the bride herself. Now days anything is possible.

[bichonlvr]

You can do a ton of things...I think the bridesmaids should help out though!!!!

[Custom Wedding Stamps]

The way I was always told and understood it to be was that the MOH RAN it and planned it, but the BM's chipped in with the cost. That is how is was done at mine as well as my sisters. I think that is only fair I don't think the cost should be all on the MOH thats a lot of money. My mother also chipped in some money as well to help out.

[flutgrl1]

i've never had to pay for a shower for any wedding i was in. I think the mother in law to be usually threw them.

did help out w/ bachelor parties tho.

I think it depends on the people involved.

[KMS]

The way I was always told and understood it to be was that the MOH RAN it and planned it, but the BM's chipped in with the cost. That is how is was done at mine as well as my sisters. I think that is only fair I don't think the cost should be all on the MOH thats a lot of money. My mother also chipped in some money as well to help out.

That's how it's usually done around here too. Although none of my bridal party had anything to do with my showers. My aunts took care of both of them. Anything goes as long as everybody involved is comfortable with it.

[Whitewater]

The last time I got married my mother threw me a shower. His mother threw me a shower. My MoH threw me a shower, and one of my mother's good friends threw me a shower.

I was showered out by the time it was all over! I was left with the impression that whoever wants to throw the bride a shower, can. Each of those times, though, there was little to no cross-over among the guest lists, so I dunno.

Personally I'd rather have one or two showers and make EVERYBODY come to them, rather than be forced to attend a gazillion little ones, because nobody wants to step out of their comfort zone.

This time around, since my MoH is three states away, my other bridesmaid will have to throw the shower, though because she's never done something like that, I think we may have to have all my Crew plan and so on, to help my deputy MoH out. We'll see.


Whitewater

[Nekochanpurr]

My family usually gets all together to do them. For my sister's, my mom, grandma, and aunts held her shower, at my cousins house. Hehe, its a family affair all around! For like.. Everything!

[HisMuse]

I don't really care if it's big or who does it as long as the people I care about are there.

[StarCoveter]

I'd say let whoever wants to help out, help! If it were me, I would like it if the BMs chipped in too, because yes, that would be a lot of money! I know that when I threw a baby shower, I did it with one other person, and it was still a LOT of money! So to do it by yourself? Crazy.

[HisMuse]

I guess I worry how much the other BMs would help as I don't know if they expect to do much more...one BM has never been one before.

[heatherh321]

I think the MOH should be involved in the planning. As a MOH 3 times over I always did the major planning (and paying) and had the other bridesmaids help by bringing food, drinks, decorations, whatever. Of course other aunts, relatives, friends, etc may throw a shower too but I think the MOH is kinda expected to do SOMETHING. I always thought the mother-of-the-bride shouldnt have to throw her own daughter a wedding shower, but thats just me....

[HisMuse]

Well if you do it at a house and others help with food it probably shouldn't have to cost a lot. I guess I just feel guilty but that's dumb I know.

[SouthernQueenBride]

Etiquette dictates that the mother of the bride or the bride herself should never host or throw the shower. B/C it can be seen as rude b/c of the gift thing.
Usually the MOH is in charge of the shower and SHE should be the one to delegate responsibilites to the other BM's.

I am having several showers:

Tea Party Themed shower - thrown by 3 BM's
Lingerie Shower - Thrown by one of MOH's (this will be at the bachelorette party)
Couples Shower - Thrown by 4 of my BM's (This is the BIG one and the most expensive b/c of the beer and wine bar will be open)
Family Shower - thrown by 2 of my aunts
Church Shower - thrown by 4 of my mom's friends from church
Future In-Law Shower - thrown by 2 of FMIL's friends.