So frustrated

[Brad's Bride in 08]

A couple months ago FH and I found out that we were going to be getting his grandma's house to live in after we get married. She was going to be moving in with his parents and she was going to sell us her house for what she owed on her home, which is like $50,000. Which would have been a steal for us!!! Well last night he told me " we are going to get nanny's house" and that totally shocked me! I mean we have been counting on having her house, our house payments only being $420.00 a month and then add in all the other expenses which would have saved us TONS of money and helped us out a lot! Well his grandma (nanny) is getting up there in age almost 70, not too old but she doesn't get around good and she already lives like 35 minutes away from them now. His mom goes and stays with her 1-2 nights a week b/c she complains that she is lonely and she is far away if anything happens, so her moving in was the perfect solution for everyone, it all seemed to work out great, it would also save her a lot of money since they wouldn't charge her rent and she would just give FH's parents $100 a month to help out with groceries and such, considering she only lives on social security. Well now FH's mom is complaining that his nanny is getting on her nerves and she doesn't think that she can live with her, b/c all she does is complain and blah blah blah, and she doesn't want to be miserable living with her for the rest of her life. I mean she loves her of course she is her mother but she says she gets on her nerves. We haven't saved any money at all for a house or to rent or anything. I mean it was pretty much a done deal, we were already getting ready to paint and recarpet the house. I am really stressed out now. I am hoping that she is just going through a spell and will hopefully get over it. I mean I don't mean to sound selfish but this has really put us in a tough situation. I am so frustrated. I don't know what to do...sorry for ranting and raving I just needed to get it out. We only have a little over 7 months and I don't know what we are going to do.:sob:

[Brad's Bride in 08]

Sorry I know that sounded really selfish of me, I am just stressed out as to what we are going to do. :whoa:

[BnB]

I would start looking for an apartment or another house in your price range

just in case

[NicksBride]

so you are not getting the house?
I can imagine that would be really frusturating.. What does his Nanny say? It sounds like she was planning on moving out and now is she worried about where to live? Could she live with you guys for awhile? I would sit down and talk with the family. If his Nanny wants to stay living in her house, unfortunately that is that.. But maybe you can talk to your family and explain the situation you are in...
I wish you good luck! Sorry this is happening...

[erika85]

It does not sound selfish. You were told something would happen and now it looks like it might not. It is totally ok for you to feel this way! I wish you the best of luck in your situation!:heart:

[Brad's Bride in 08]

Well yes his nanny does want to move out and I'm pretty sure that she doesn't even have a clue as to what is going on. Its FMIL, I understand that taking care of an older person is hard work because they are limited on what they are able to do on their own. So in that case I see where she is coming from but on the other side, she is the one who is constantly calling her and making sure she is okay, she has to take her to the store every 2 weeks for groceries and such and it would be a lot easier for her to do that if she was in the same household. We live in the country in Smithfield and nanny live abotu 35 minutes away even further into the country in Surry and the nearest fire and rescue and police is Smithfield so thats a concern. She has no street lights and things like that. I'm thinking that FMIL is just tired of her right now b/c she has spent like 5 nights with her the past week and a half. Nanny doesn't ever see anyone unless we go there which isn't very often so when she does she talks constantly which is understandable I would do the same. So hopefully she will realize not only will it help us out but also nanny and her for the stress factor and health.

[Brad's Bride in 08]

It does not sound selfish. You were told something would happen and now it looks like it might not. It is totally ok for you to feel this way! I wish you the best of luck in your situation!:heart:

Thank you :whoohoo:

[NicksBride]

Good luck, I would be upset too.. I hope it all works out for you!! ((HUGS)))

[cowboysbride]

I can see both sides...yours and FMIL's. I understand why you feel frustrated and it's okay to feel that way...you had your hopes built up and now it looks like it might not happen (((HUGS))), that stinks but I've always tried to think that if it's meant to be it will be and if not try not to get to upset about it, there's always a reason for things happening or not happening...

As for your FMIL's side I can understand that too...having your mom stay with you can be stressful...my mom and I love each other very much and she is still very capable of taking care of herself ...she stayed with me after the birth of my son for 2 wks and did everything for me but at the end of the two weeks she was glad to get to go home and I was happy that I could get back into my normal routines...it takes a very special kind of person to take care of an elderly parent.

I wish you the best!

[Measha]

Sounds like a tough situation, but it also sounds like you are doing the right thing. Which is considering Nanny's health and happiness. I'm sure it will all work out as it should! Just hang in there *hugs*

[Nekochanpurr]

You sound like you are trying to do the right thing, you don't sound selfish at all! i would be upset too.. Hopefully everything works out.